Us
by ChloeTheBearx
Summary: Sequel to Where Is My Mind.  Follows Clare and Eli through their revived relationship.  What joys and troubles will married life bring these two?  Read and Review little darlings  :
1. Chapter 1

_I was hoping I would get feedback for a sequel, so thank you for not disappointing (: I couldn't wait any longer, so here it is! It's named for the song _Us_ by the ever so lovely Regina Spektor. I interpret the song to be about two lovers who share a love and a dream and strive for it, as well as searching for an answer to some unknown question. I think it beautifully represents Eclare's journey into their future together as a married couple. I hope you like it, please review and let me know what you think! Oh, and just a fair warning, I wasted no time jumping right into smut :D_

I pulled up to the Toronto Airport at midnight, just fifteen minutes before Clare was set to land.

My hands were shaking.

I was happy, unbelievably so.

But I was also nervous as hell.

What now?

Would we spend a few good months together before she realized her mistake and didn't want to be with me anymore?

I knew better, I knew Clare wouldn't make any drastic decisions without weighing out every possible outcome, but I still couldn't help but worry.

The best thing that could have ever happened to me did, and I wasn't going to let anything mess it up.

I sat in Morty who was still going strong after the long car ride and waited for another ten minutes.

Finally, I made my way inside and walked into the baggage claim.

In a few short minutes, I saw the girls chatting animatedly as they walked over to where I stood.

Clare's face lit up as our eyes locked, causing me to grin uncontrollably.

"Wow, a sincere smile from the King of Death?" Alli asked sarcastically, raising a brow at me.

"Shut up, Alli," Clare said distractedly, finally reaching me and wrapping her arms around my waist in a suffocating hug.

My arms were around her smaller frame and I pressed my lips to the top of her sweet smelling hair.

"I missed you," she mumbled into my chest.

"I missed you more," I said softly, removing an arm from around her and lifting her face to me.

I kissed her gently, my lips curled up into a small smile as I did so.

She was smiling brightly when we pulled back from each other.

"Aren't you two just the cutest?" one of the girls said, earning giggles from a few more.

I hardly heard them, Clare, my _wife,_ the only thing holding my attention.

Soon, the luggage began to come out on the rotating belt and the girls went to get their things. I stayed with the luggage they continually brought back to me.

I saw Clare and Alli talking in hushed tones, seemingly arguing at times.

I wondered what they were talking about, Clare seemed pissed and Alli wasn't backing down.

Clare suddenly placed a hand on her hip, and I knew she meant business.

She fiercely spoke to Alli, and once she had finished with a huff, Alli spoke calmly and they hugged.

When they brought the last of their bags to me, Alli offered a small smile.

"I'm sorry I've been so… rude," she started, nearly struggling with the apology. "I'm just really protective of Clare, and when you hurt her… Well honestly I wanted to kill you. But she seems really happy now, so you must be doing something right. She hasn't been this way for a long time. Five years, actually," she hinted.

"What I'm trying to say is congratulations and good luck. And if you hurt her again, I really will kill you this time."

"Alli!" Clare said, slapping the other girl's arm lightly.

"Well it's only fair to warn him," she answered with a smirk.

I just chuckled lightly, "Thanks Alli."

She smiled smugly before rejoining the other girls.

"We'll go home as soon as I say goodbye to the rest of the girls," Clare said to me before pecking my cheek and rejoining the girls.

Home.

I had a home.

I never considered my apartment in Vegas to be home, it always felt temporary.

I watched Clare hug her friends and bid them goodbye, and promise to call Alli after we were settled to make last minute wedding plans.

And before I knew it, she was back at my side.

I didn't let her carry her bags, which she protested but I didn't give in.

We made our way out to Morty and she opened the back so I could set her bags down.

Before I could walk around to the driver's side, Clare's arms were tight around me.

"You don't know how unbelievably happy I am," she whispered.

"I think I do. Because I'm just as happy," I replied, running my hands up and down her back.

She brought her hands to my chest, and then slid them up and down mimicking my movements.

One of her hands slid into the pocket of my blazer and suddenly she pulled away.

There was a mischievous gleam in her eye as she dangled the keys to Morty in front of me.

"What's yours is mine, right Mr. Goldsworthy?"

She always tried to get me to let her drive Morty when we were together.

I never budged, not because I didn't trust her but because Morty was my baby.

However, she was right.

I hesitated before nodding a pained nod.

"Right, Mrs. Goldsworthy. Just… be gentle with him, okay?"

"Don't worry."

We got into the car, and it felt eerie sitting in the passenger seat.

I winced when she turned the ignition, and she giggled at my tense appearance.

She started to drive, and I busied myself with my hands, keeping my eyes trained on them.

She made a rather sharp turn, causing me to shoot my head up.

"Sorry," she said quickly, "That turn gets me every time!"

"It's okay," I said in the most soothing voice I could muster, which wasn't a very convincing one.

I noticed our surroundings and realized it was an eerily familiar street.

When Clare finally pulled Morty into a driveway, I looked up and I was shocked.

"Your old house? You still live here?" I asked, surprised.

"Yeah," she said with a small smile. "It was paid off by the time I was done with school, so my parents decided to sign it over to me. It was nice because it's… or it was, the only thing I had left."

Her eyes turned sad, as she undoubtedly was thinking of me leaving all of those years ago.

I brought my hand to rest at the crook of her neck and angled her head towards mine.

"Clare, I'm here now. And I'm not going anywhere. You couldn't get rid of me if you tried."

She smiled a weak smile up at me and sighed.

"I know. And that makes me happy, it really does."

"Not as happy as it makes me," I murmured before pressing my lips to hers in a deep kiss.

It only became deeper, and when her hands began to roam my body it became harder to control myself.

"Do you… want… to go… inside?" I murmured between kisses, holding her tight against me.

She moaned and gave a nod in response.

I withdrew myself from her after a few more drawn out kisses and we quickly exited the car, leaving all of her bags and my boxes of belongings behind.

She fumbled with her keys, trying to find the one that would unlock her front door.

Finally, she inserted it, turned it, and opened the door.

Before she could take a step inside, I swept her off her feet and held her against me, bridal style.

She gasped at the sudden movement, but when she relaxed into my arms she smiled at me and snaked her arms around my neck.

"It's only proper," I explained with a smirk.

She laughed softly before burying her face in my neck for a kiss.

I carried her into the house but quickly stopped, not knowing which room was hers.

"Upstairs, last door on the left," she murmured, her lips still moving against my neck.

I kicked the front door closed and carried her up the stairs to the room that used to belong to her parents.

I carried her into the room and set her down gently on the bed before lowering myself on top of her.

She wrapped her arms around me and pulled me down to a passionate kiss.

We pressed our bodies against each other hard, already breathing heavily.

I slid my hand up under her shirt, slowly caressing her warm soft skin.

Kneeling between her legs, my hands met at the hem of her shirt and lifted it gently, completely pulling it off when she arched her back to let me do so.

While she was still lifted up I also removed her bra, immediately turning my attention to her exposed breasts.

As my lips, tongue, teeth, and fingers all worked together to tease and pull her nipples, earning deep breaths and moans from her.

Her hands began to roam my body, gripping and pulling on the fabric of my shirt.

I sat up on my knees, allowing her access to pull the shirt over my head.

Her nails dug into my skin, scratching all the way down the length of my torso and giving me a chill.

I let my weight fall on her again, our half naked bodies flush against each other.

We tumbled around on the large bed, our bodies desperate to find one another.

Her small fingers struggled with the button of my pants and I groaned as her hands moved against the bulge making my jeans tight.

I felt her smirk against my lips as she finally got the button undone and nearly ripped my pants off of me.

She shifted her position and pushed me down on my back so she was now lying above me.

With one hand I undid her pants and pulled them down.

She kissed me hungrily, moving her legs around me to straddle my hips.

As she did so, I lifted myself to grind against her.

My hands moved lightly against her smooth legs, teasing her.

She whimpered as we shared slow, lingering kisses.

"God, Eli, you don't know what you do to me," she murmured against my lips.

"Sure I do," I mumbled back, taking her in my arms and flipping her back over to her back.

I pinned her down and roamed her neck with my lips, growing hungrier with every passing minute.

She moaned my name, driving me crazier.

My lips moved down to her exposed torso, pausing for a long while on her breasts.

I let go of her arms, but she stayed lying still as if I still held her that way.

My lips lightly trailed her stomach, my tongue peaking out to taste her every so often.

I reached the top of her underwear and slid my tongue across from hipbone to hipbone, causing her breath to hitch.

I brought my lips back to the middle.

My teeth now around her panties, I pulled them down slowly.

Once they were off, I spread her legs wide and without missing a beat inserted my tongue deep into her.

"Eli!" she yelled in surprise, her hands finding my hair and tangling themselves into it.

I brought my thumb up to massage her clit as my tongue rapidly moved in and out of her.

A string of gasps and moans spilled from her lips.

I let my fingers and my tongue switch places, my middle and ring fingers pumping in and out of her as my tongue flicked over her clit.

"Clare," I murmured against her, my voice humming against her, "You're so fucking sexy, baby."

She pulled on my hair hard while nearly yelling another moan.

I slowly eased my fingers out of her and crawled up to her, my face inches from hers.

Her eyes opened to meet mine, and they were much, much darker than usual.

Biting her lower lip and keeping eye contact, she pulled my boxers down, kicking them off when they reached my knees.

She wrapped her legs around me and brought me down to her, and I could feel her warm, wet opening with the tip of my cock.

She rubbed herself against me, teasing.

I groaned and let one of my hands gently tug on several locks of auburn curls, already tangled and messy.

She gasped and her eyes closed tight, and just moments later I finally pushed myself inside of her.

I moved slowly at first, pushing myself deeper in her with every thrust.

Her hands found my shoulders and her nails dug into my back, the pain only pushing me past all sane thoughts.

I began to move furiously inside of her, not keeping any particular pace.

"Oh… oh Eli!" she moaned, her legs tightening around my waist.

I continued my sporadic movements, picking up pace.

I groaned at the indescribable pleasure coursing through me.

She yelled as I hit that special place inside of her.

It was at this time that I became consistent, knowing that I could pleasure her best like this.

Her yelling subsided, but her voice did not.

She panted heavily as she moaned uncontrollably.

"Oh, Eli… Oh baby… God… Right… There…"

She struggled to form words, and only breathed them between her moans.

I continued at my exact pace, hitting her in the same spot every time.

"Come on, Clare. Get off with me, baby," I growled, feeling myself close to coming but holding back until she did.

She cried out in pleasure and after just a few more thrusts I felt her tighten around me and the sexiest yell escaped her, her hands clutching the sheets for support and her back arching off of the bed.

As I felt her release, I let myself go as well.

We panted in unison as we both finished.

I remained above her, my lips moving tenderly upon her forehead, her cheek, her nose, her lips.

She slid her arms loosely around my waist as her legs fell to the bed.

I settled into the bed beside her, letting my eyes fall closed.

"Eli?" she murmured sleepily, curling her body closer to mine.

"Yeah?" I asked gently.

"I love you," she whispered, gently placing a kiss to my chest.

I held her tighter, smiling at her words.

I'd never get tired of hearing that.

"I love you too, Clare."

My life had never been better.

Here I was, lying in bed with the woman I loved, able to call her my wife and put at ease by the promise of forever with her.

_I know it's not super long or anything, it's just something to take off with. I have a few ideas as far as plot twists and whatnot, but I'm 100% open to any suggestions you may have! You're all my inspiration (:_


	2. Chapter 2

_I'm so excited I decided to write this story. It's my favorite idea I've ever had and I just can't let it go! As with Where Is My Mind, I'll have alternating points of view depending on the situation. Enjoy!_

The next morning when I woke up, I smiled at the feeling of Eli beside me.

I slowly and carefully got out of bed as not to wake him.

Once downstairs I searched for food and ended up finding eggs and bread.

Not much, but it would do.

As I put on a pot of coffee and began to make French toast and scrambled eggs for the two of us, it all hit me.

Here I was, making breakfast for myself and my _husband_.

The idea was crazy.

Crazy and absolutely perfect.

The food was nearly done when the phone rang.

I answered the one mounted on the wall in the kitchen and held it between my head and shoulder while my hands remained busy with the food.

"Hello?" I asked cheerfully.

"Honey, you're back? Why didn't you call when you got in?"

"Sorry mom. I was… preoccupied."

"It's okay. I can't wait for dinner tonight, I miss you."

Dinner tonight. Shit.

"Oh, yeah, it will be great," I said in my best attempt to sound convincing.

"We're going to that cute little Italian place downtown," she explained, "and, there's someone who I'd like you to meet."

Her voice held a sickening sweetness to it, and I knew she'd met someone.

Not that I cared much anymore, I was used to my parents not being together at this point.

I told her that I couldn't wait to see her as well as dad (he would be joining us as well) and quickly got off the phone.

I put all of the food onto two plates and poured two mugs of coffee, my mind racing.

I wondered what to do about Eli.

My parents hated him with everything in them for how much he had hurt me.

But they didn't know how much like his old self he still was.

How absolutely perfect for me he was.

As I put the plates and mugs all onto a tray and began to carry it carefully up the stairs, I decided that I didn't care.

I would tell them about Eli and I, and I wouldn't care no matter what they thought.

Gently pushing open the door, I saw that he was still peacefully asleep.

I sat with the tray in my lap and nudged him lightly.

"Eli, honey wake up," I cooed, gently gliding my fingers through his hair.

He stirred lightly and I spoke again, "There's food waiting for you. And coffee. It'll get cold…"

With the mention of that, his eyes slowly opened.

The most adorable grin spread across his lips as he looked up at me.

"Good morning, wife," he said groggily.

A grin to match his found its way to my features, "Good morning, husband."

He sat up to my height and leaned back against the headboard, as I was.

"You're amazing," he mumbled, already reaching for the plate with more food on it and the slightly bigger mug.

I took a sip from my coffee and shrugged, smiling softly, "You deserve it."

We ate and talked comfortably, enjoying each other to our fullest.

After a while, I decided I needed to tell him about my phone conversation.

"So when I was downstairs my mom called," I began, causing him to look on in fear.

I knew he was probably terrified of what my parents thought of him now.

"I completely forgot but before I left I promised to have dinner with them the night after I got back. So tonight I have to meet them at seven thirty. You're invited to come, of course, but I can understand if you don't want to go. Hell, I don't even want to go."

"I'm invited?" he asked incredulously. "You told them what happened and I'm invited?"

"Well… not exactly. What I mean was, you're invited by me," I said with a sweet smile causing him to chuckle, unconvinced. "I'm waiting for the right time to tell them, but really I don't care one bit either way. Your mine, I love you, and you love me. That's all that matters."

He reached up to smooth down my messy hair and smiled at me.

"You're something else, Clare."

We finished our meal and cuddled closely as we finished the coffee.

Just then my phone rang again and I groaned at the urgency everyone seemed to have to talk to me.

I knew they were only calling the house phone because I'd left my cell in the car and wasn't answering it.

I reached over to the nightstand beside where I was lying and picked up the phone.

"Hello?" I asked, a little impatient.

"Wake up on the wrong side of the bed, little miss sunshine?" I heard from a teasing tone on the other end.

"Oh, hey Adam!" my voice quickly changed to one of cheer.

"Hey, I can't talk long because I need to change Hugo," he paused and I laughed knowing the face he was probably making, "But Fi and I were wondering if the new happy couple would want to come have lunch and catch up with your oldest and dearest friends?"

I shook my head, smiling widely, "Of course we would, my old dear friend. It'll take us a while to get up and around, but we should be there around noon."

He said that sounded perfect and bid me goodbye.

As I hung up the phone, Eli was smiling and I could tell he was in thought.

"I can't believe this is happening to me," he said simply.

I smiled and curled up to his chest.

"But wait," he started, "Why can't we just get dressed and go now? Why is it going to take us a while to get ready?" He raised a brow at me, to which I smiled mischievously.

"Because, sweetie, we have to shower."

"And showering is going to take us the rest of the morning?"

I bit my lip and got up from the bed, walking around to his side and holding out my hand to him.

"The kind of showering I have in mind will."

His eyes widened for a brief moment as he smirked and eagerly took my hand.

I pulled him into the bathroom in our room, laughing softly as he quickly trailed behind.

Within seconds what little clothes we were wearing were strewn about the floor and the water was on at a steamy hot temperature.

We both got in, and my eyes studied every inch of his body, sexy by the water falling down it.

I blushed and looked up, smirking when I saw him doing the same.

He inched closer to me, his hands gliding across my skin as he pulled me full on against him.

I stood with my legs slightly apart, which he used to his advantage when he slid himself between them, already becoming hard.

He began to kiss me hungrily.

Something came over me in that moment, something bold, and I quickly pulled myself from the kiss and fell to my knees.

I glanced up at him as my hand began to move up and down along the length of his shaft, and his mouth was slightly ajar.

I smirked before taking him in my mouth and sucking long and hard.

Water fell over my face and I closed my eyes, moaning around him.

"Fuck, Clare," I heard him breathe as his hand found the wall for support.

His pleasure only sent me into overdrive as I began to move my mouth quickly over his length.

His breathing was shaky as were his legs, which I grasped and dug my nails into.

I was more turned on with every groan he made.

I whimpered as his free hand found my mess of wet hair and pulled on hit hard, and I tasted his orgasm just seconds after.

After he finished, I swallowed what was in my mouth and stood slowly, realizing my own legs were a bit shaky.

When he looked at me, he didn't smirk.

He didn't smile, or do anything of the sort.

His eyes were dark as he backed me against the wall behind me, and he lifted one of my legs so that my foot was on the ledge of the shower.

He now got to his knees and it was his turn to pleasure me.

His tongue lingered as he lazily slid it up and down between my folds, causing my hands to shake.

Then, slowly, he began to pump only one finger in and out of me as his tongue circled my clit.

"More," I breathed.

"What was that, Clare?" he murmured against me, the vibrations of his voice sending a jolt of pleasure coursing through me.

"More, Eli," I moaned loudly.

He shoved two more fingers inside of me and pumped them in and out violently.

I moaned loudly at the feeling, my head resting back on the wall.

He was wise in knowing I wouldn't have been able to keep my balance on my own.

His fingers and tongue working together to pleasure me made my own climax build rather quickly.

"Oh, God, don't stop," I moaned weakly, letting myself submit to the feelings he was giving me.

His movements only became more intense and pushed me even closer.

My moans were quickly turning to yells and with the moments that came soon after they became a full scream. I screamed his name between the sounds of pleasure spilling uncontrollably through me.

When I was done and my voice had died down, he stood in front of me and smirked darkly down at me.

I smiled lazily up at him, a deep blush coming to my cheeks.

His hands found their way around me and he held me tight as I regained my balance.

"I never knew how much fun showers were," he said softly against the top of my head.

I giggled and turned to get the shampoo that sat in the corner.

"Now for actually getting clean. You're going to have to smell like a girl until you get some of your own bathroom supplies," I explained as I squirted out some of the liquid and lathered it between my hands.

I reached up and worked it into his shoulder-length hair, smiling as his eyes fell closed.

After a minute he opened his eyes and reached for the shampoo, now working it into my hair.

When we both had cleaned each other's hair, we took turn rinsing the suds out.

We worked conditioner into our own hair, and then went to clean each other with soap and the loofah hanging from the showerhead.

All clean, we rinsed off and got out of the shower to greet the cold air of the bathroom.

I shivered as I opened the cabinet above the toilet and pulled out two plush towels.

Handing one to him and wrapping the other around me, my teeth chattered.

He walked over to me, towel around his waist and looking deliciously sexy.

I smiled up at him to which he smirked before pressing a kiss to my forehead.

When I was dry I walked into my room and opened the walk-in closet, going inside to find something to wear.

When I had pulled on a simple white shirt and a floral skirt, I walked back out to the room to see him lying naked on the bed.

I laughed, shaking my head at his smirk.

"Eli, we have to get ready. It's nearly eleven thirty and I said we'd be there at noon."

"The only clothes I have in here are those," he said, pointing to the pile of clothes he had worn last night, "and they're dirty. My bags are still in the car."

I sighed and leaned down to kiss him.

Where are your keys? I'll go get your clothes."

He smiled gratefully at me and found the keys in the pocket of his jeans.

When I reappeared in the room, I had his box labeled "clothes" and I set it on the floor.

It was surprisingly light, and I made a mental note to take him shopping sometime soon.

He fished through the box before finding a slightly torn pair of jeans, a simple black t-shirt, and a black blazer.

"Same old Eli," I said with a giggle. "Except, I'm surprised that the jeans are actually blue."

"Dark blue," he said with a small chuckle.

After we had finished getting ready, hand in hand we walked down the stairs.

Out of habit I began to walk towards the door to the garage, as he tried to pull me in the direction of the front door.

"Where are you going?" he asked curiously, stopping in his tracks.

"Oh, sorry. It's a habit, taking my car. But we could take Morty if you want."

He shrugged, "Doesn't matter to me."

I pulled him to the front door, smiling brightly, "Might as well give Adam and Fiona an entrance in style."

He laughed and followed me out to his hearse.

The other couple only lived a few streets down, so we were there within the next ten minutes.

When I told Eli to make the last turn, his eyes were nearly bulging out of his head.

"I've certainly never been to this neck of the woods before," he said, looking all around at the mansions surrounding us.

"It was a graduation present from Mrs. Coyne," I explained, referring to the house, which I pointed to and he pulled up.

We got out and walked up the long winding pathway to their front door.

Before I rang the doorbell, I looked to Eli.

His hands were shaking lightly and his eyes were wide and blank.

"Don't be nervous. It won't be weird, I promise."

I took one of his shaking hands, and he eagerly wrapped his fingers around mine.

"Okay," he breathed. "So you swear it will be fine?"

"Cross my heart," I murmured, leaning up to place a soft kiss on his cheek.

He smiled faintly and I reached out to ring the bell.

I felt a tight squeeze from him when the handle started to move.

We were greeted by a grinning Adam.

He stepped aside for us to walk in, and shut the door behind us.

I took my hand from Eli's to throw my arms around my friend and hug him.

He laughed lightly and hugged me back.

When we withdrew our arms from each other, I stood aside and watched as the two men's eyes locked.

There was a brief moment of silence as they just stared at each other, but within the minute they embraced one another in a hug.

I completely saw what they had meant when they talked of each other as brothers.

They stayed like that for a good few minutes before finally pulling back.

Both of their eyes were slightly red, and Eli tuned his head to swipe his thumb across the bottom of his.

They laughed softly, realizing they were turning emotional.

Their tears and smiles brought tears to my own eyes.

"It's about damn time," Adam said with a smile stretched across his lips, to which Eli laughed and gave a small nod.

"I know, man. I'm so-"

"Don't apologize. No need," Adam said graciously, Eli relaxing a bit.

"Now, would you like a tour of the place?" Adam asked, looking around at the huge space around him.

"Hell yeah," Eli chuckled and the boys were talking animatedly as they left the room.

I had been to the house countless times; it was like my own second home.

So rather than follow them, I left to go find Fiona and the baby.

I went up the winding stairwell and found the newly decorated door that read the baby's name.

I knocked lightly before entering, and I smiled immediately upon seeing the sweet angel in Fiona's arms as she swayed back and forth in a rocking chair.

"Look, baby, it's Aunt Clare!" Fiona said with a smile.

She stood and hugged me with a free arm, holding Hugo in her other.

I hugged her back and kissed the top of the baby's head.

"So are the guys talking?" Fiona asked with a raised brow.

I nodded, "Yeah, it was really emotional. They were hugging and they both teared up. It was precious, really." I laughed softly, shaking my head.

"Awe," she said with a little giggle. "I'm glad it wasn't awkward for them. They really need each other."

"They really do," I agreed.

We continued to talk as we sat on the floor.

I spread a blanket between us on which Fiona laid the baby.

As I caught her up on what all had happened, Hugo rolled over and began to crawl quickly across the blanket.

"So you actually got married? And you're going to stay married?" she asked as I caught the baby just as he was about to disappear behind my back.

"Yeah. I know it's crazy, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't question my own sanity for it. But I love him, and I just know. I know I won't ever find anyone who I love more. He's just… everything."

Her eyes twinkled as she grinned at me.

Her gaze shifted from me to the area behind me and back again, and I hesitantly turned my head to see what she was looking at.

Eli and Adam were standing there, Eli smiling lovingly down at me.

"And this is the baby's room!" Adam said cheerily. He bypassed Eli and walked into the room, crouching down to lift the baby from the blanket where he played.

He giggled as Adam gently tickled his tummy, causing all of us to smile and eliciting "awe's" from Fiona and me.

Adam carried him to the doorway where Eli still stood.

"Hugo, this is Uncle Eli. Eli, this is Hugo." As Adam spoke, a smile never left his lips.

Every time he was around Hugo he completely lit up.

"Hey, little guy," Eli said softly, touching the baby's hand with his finger.

Hugo grasped the finger and held it tight, causing Eli's eyes to light up.

"Think he likes you, man," Adam said with a nod. "Want to hold him?"

"Sure," Eli breathed.

Adam held Hugo out to him and explained the best way to hold him.

Eli took the baby and held him comfortably.

I smiled at the sight, Eli looking so sweet with the child in his arms.

"You know," I started, "If you guys would like to get out sometime and get a break, we'd love to babysit."

Eli smiled up at me, finally pulling his attention from the baby. "Yeah, we really would."

"We'll have to take you up on that sometime," Fiona said eagerly, Adam nodding in agreement.

"We love the little shit, but a break sounds wonderful," he added.

"Don't call him a shit!" Fiona said, slapping Adam's arm lightly. He laughed.

"Well, anytime you need to get away just let us know," I said with a smile, my eyes on Eli whose eyes were back on the baby.

We stayed for the rest of the afternoon, talking to our friends and playing with Hugo.

Finally when six o'clock came around, we finally bid our goodbyes and left.

Eli was a smiling fool the whole drive home.

"You're happy," I said, stating the obvious. I giggled softly.

"This is so perfect, Clare," he said, reaching out and giving my knee a squeeze. "It's like I'm getting a second chance at a happy life."

"I'm glad I can be a part of that life," I said softly, resting my hand on his.

"Clare, sweetie, you're the whole reason for it. You're everything," he said with a smirk, borrowing my description of him earlier that day.

He put the hearse into park and I leaned over to kiss his lips softly.

This time when we went inside, we carried our belongings with us.

It took several trips, but not too many.

Eli had a surprisingly small amount of belongings after he'd thrown away all of the junk.

"So are you going to dinner tonight?" I asked softly as we shut the door behind us.

He sighed, and I knew his answer then.

"Clare, I really wish I could. But I don't think it's a great idea. I mean, if you want me to I will but-"

"Eli, it's fine. You're probably right." I pulled his face down to mine and placed a long, slow kiss on his lips.

"You're not mad, are you?" he asked hesitantly after we'd pulled apart.

"Not at all," I said with a soft smile, going in for one more quick kiss before heading upstairs to get ready for dinner.

Using a curling iron I made a few of my curls even curlier and I applied some light make up.

I changed my skirt and pulled on a pair of dark-wash jeans, red heels, and a dark purple cardigan.

When I walked downstairs again, Eli had opened the first box and was rifling through its contents.

"I'll be back around nine or so," I said quickly, looking around for my purse.

"Okay," he said looking up to me.

I found the small black bag and pulled its long thin strap over my shoulder.

"I love you," I said as we met in the middle of the room and slid our arms around each other.

"I love you too," he answered. "And might I say, you look absolutely lovely."

I laughed softly and placed a kiss on his lips.

"Well thank you. See you tonight."

I walked out to the garage and hit the button to open the door.

I got into my white two-door Volkswagen Golf and backed out of the drive, disappearing out of the neighborhood.

As I pulled up to the Italian restaurant where we would be having dinner, I sighed.

My parents could have a relationship as screwed up as they come when I was younger.

Yet there was a double standard for me to find Mr. Perfect-in-every-way.

I just knew that my parents would flip shit if they knew Eli and I were together, much less married.

I was greeted at the door by my parents, standing at a respectable distance from one another but smiling brightly at me.

I hugged my mom first, then my dad.

When they took me to our table, there was a blonde woman appearing to be in her mid-thirties and a man with salt-and-pepper hair.

The woman I knew to be my dad's girlfriend. I was sure the man was who my mom wanted me to meet.

"Clare, this is Brad," my mom said with a bright smile. The man shook my hand and smiled warmly.

"Nice to meet you, Brad."

"Clare-bear, have you heard the news?" my dad asked suddenly, "Natalie and I are engaged."

"Engaged, really?" I asked looking to the other couple.

"I'd assumed your mother would have told you," he said, glancing over at my mom.

"That's no business of mine," my mom shot back.

Great.

They couldn't be civil for one evening. One evening I didn't even ask for.

"Okay, look. If we're going to do this, you're going to get along and stop acting like children." I crossed my arms and sent them both daggers with my glare.

"Clare, what's gotten into you?" my mom asked, her cheeks growing red with embarrassment. "I'm sorry, Brad," she said hurriedly to the man beside her.

We ordered our food and ate with tension all around us.

There was occasional small talk, but no one seemed to be enjoying themselves.

And then, my parents started bickering about the check, debating which of them would pay for me.

Insults flew across the table like fire.

I had enough.

"Guys, just stop! This is ridiculous! You know, not once has someone asked me how I've been doing these past few weeks. How Vegas was, if I'd had fun on my trip. Well, had you asked, you might have found out that I got married!" I held up my hand to show the diamond ring that sat there. "Yeah, I know. I'm married! And guess who to? Just guess?"

I knew I was starting to sound like a crazy person, but that's exactly what they did to me when they were together.

"Clare Diane Edwards, you'd better not be serious."

"Actually, it's Clare Diane _Goldsworthy_, mom. Goldsworthy. Yeah, it's kind of a funny story. I ran into _Eli_ there. You remember Eli, right? Yeah well he was working in Vegas. We ran into each other and a few nights of copious amounts of alcohol and hot, passionate sex later, we were married! He's actually back home waiting for me. You know, I was planning on having a civil night with you guys. Looks like all of that went to shit."

"I don't even know who you are anymore!" my mom said with tears forming in her eyes.

My dad just shook his head sadly at me.

"Well I haven't known who either of you are anymore either. For the last five years. Call me when you can be mature."

Without another word I stormed out of the restaurant.

Any other time I would have been upset after a confrontation like that.

I would have cried and I would have been a complete wreck for the rest of the night.

But with Eli waiting at home for me, I didn't care about my parents and their issues.

I didn't care that I had acted completely insane back there.

All I cared about was the happiness I felt when I was with Eli.

I pulled into the garage and walked into the house.

"Eli?" I called out after seeing he was not downstairs. "Where are you?"

"Upstairs!" he called out.

I ran up the stairs and into our room to see him hanging his clothes in my dad's old closet.

I didn't have enough belongings to ever put it to use so it had stayed empty.

"You're unpacking," I said softly, hit by a wave of emotions.

This was real.

"Yeah, I'm almost done, actually. One more box to go," he said with an excited gleam in his eye.

"That's great, sweetie," I said as I made my way over to him.

He pulled me into an embrace and kissed my lips countless times.

"Mmm," he mumbled against my lips with a smirk. "So how was dinner?"

I pulled away from him and groaned, throwing myself down on the bed.

"It was awful. My parents were being idiots and I freaked out and went on a rant. Like a crazy person."

"Oh, baby, I'm sorry," he said with concern in his voice. I felt him sit beside me as his hand found mine.

"Something good came from it, though," I said quietly, peaking at him.

"What's that?" he asked with a raised brow.

"They know about us. I got that part out of the way."

"Really? How did they take that?" he asked with a dark chuckle.

"Well, that's sort of what I was talking about on my psychotic rant, so not too well," I said, wincing a bit.

"It's alright, baby, don't worry about them. They'll come around." 

He leaned down and kissed the top of my head softly.

"I love you," he murmured against my hair.

"I love you too," I whispered back, wrapping my arms tightly around him and pulling him to the bed with me.

As we held each other tightly, I realized something.

Eli was my Mr. Perfect.

He may not be a perfect person, but he's perfect for me.

And I knew for a fact, there was no one else for me.

I was really thinking that this relationship could go the distance.

_Haha, I loved writing Clare's fit of insanity. Things will start to pick up and there will be twists eventually, but for now I wanted to keep it optimistic because of how much I made you suffer at the beginning of the other story. Keep the suggestions coming, and keep reviewing! The review, story, and author alerts I've been getting just make my day (:_


	3. Chapter 3

_I'm glad you all are loving this as much as I am. Continue to let me know what you think! And MelissaIsLame, I do love suggestions and I really liked yours! I'll work something like that in within the next few chapters (:_

Sometime around one in the morning I woke up from the deep sleep that had encompassed me.

I realized that the lights were still on and Eli and I were still in our clothes from earlier.

I got up to get changed, pulling off my jeans and my cardigan.

Just as I was about to go to the dresser to find shorts to sleep in, I felt a pair of hands wrap around my thigh to keep me from going any further.

I looked down to see Eli smirking groggily up at me.

"Can I help you?" I asked with a small giggle.

"You're going to put clothes on, right?" he asked softly.

"Yeah," I replied, "Why?"

"Don't," he said with a mischievous grin. "That's how you can help me."

I smiled and sat on the bed beside him.

Immediately, he had me pinned down and was kissing me passionately.

Moaning into his mouth, my hands roamed his body freely.

I lifted his shirt and he broke the kiss just long enough for me to pull it the rest of the way off, and to do the same to me.

His lips connected with mine again and his hand slid between my breasts, unclasping my bra.

I pulled hard on the fabric of his jeans, causing the bulge in his pants to rub against me. I moaned again.

His hand groped my breast as I feverishly tried to undo his pants.

Once my mission was accomplished, I pushed his pants down as far as I could reach.

He kicked them off the rest of the way.

He continued kissing me, but doing just that.

The building desire inside of me needed to be relieved, and his hands had fallen respectively at my sides.

I found his hand and grabbed it forcefully, placing it against my drenched panties and using his fingers to massage myself.

He groaned and began to move his fingers himself, pushing past the fabric of my underwear and plunging them into me.

But this was all he did. He didn't advance one bit.

I whined under him and I felt him smirk against my lips.

Must I do everything? This had been his damn idea, hadn't it?

I placed my hands on his shoulders and clenched them tightly before pushing him back onto his back and rolling over on top of him.

I took his boxers and pulled them all the way off before removing my own underwear and settling myself on top of him.

He moaned my name as I rubbed my exposed wet center against him.

Unable to take it anymore, I lifted myself and grasped his cock, raising it upward.

I slowly lowered myself over him, lingering and watching the nearly pained look on his face that came with the agony of waiting.

Once I had lowered myself around the entire length of him, I began to rise and fall only slightly faster. It wasn't until I had caused him to buck his hips that I began to ride him recklessly.

I alternated between up and down and back and forth as I continued moving on top of him.

His fingers grasped my hips tightly, causing me to whimper.

He bit his lower lip, staring up at me hungrily.

As I moved back and forth, I found my rhythm as is cock hit my most sensitive spot.

I moved back and forth quickly on top of him, digging my fingers into his chest and scratching all the way down to his hips.

"Oh, god, Clare," he moaned, his eyes falling closed.

"E-Eli," I breathed, hanging my head low and feeling my hair fall around my face as we continued to move in harmony.

I let out a long, loud moan as I felt myself come.

I shook where I sat on top of him, moving slowly as I finished.

After giving him a dark smirk, I pulled my self off of him and collapsed to the bed beside him.

"What the hell, Clare?" he whined, grabbing my waist to lift me up again.

"You made me do all the work. If you want to finish, it's your turn to work now."

He immediately grabbed my hand and closed it around himself, forcing it up and down. I began to pump my fist around him myself, feeling that it was lubricated from my wetness.

He pushed me hard against the bed, kneeling between my legs and pulling my hand away. He groaned as he pushed himself inside of me and began moving.

I moaned softly, over and over again, knowing it drove him crazy.

His eyes were closed tight, and I knew he was already almost there.

After a few short minutes, I felt him release inside of me and call out my name in pleasure.

When he finished and let himself fall beside me, I stroked his damp hair tenderly.

"So what was up with that?" I asked with a raised brow, "I couldn't get you to do anything on your own."

"It's really sexy when you take charge, Clare," he smirked lazily at me.

I slapped his arm lightly, but just laughed.

I curled up to him and yawned sleepily.

"Goodnight, Clare. I love you," he whispered as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Night, Eli. Love you too."

We soon fell into a deep sleep.

Seven o'clock the next morning, only five hours after we'd finally gone back to sleep, my phone rung loudly.

I groaned, sitting up to answer it.

"Hello?" I mumbled groggily.

"Clare! The wedding is tomorrow! Come help me, I'm in crisis mode!" Alli shrieked into the phone.

I knew if I fought with her she would only get more unbearable, so I agreed to meet her in an hour and hung up.

"What was that? Where are you going?" Eli grumbled beside me.

He didn't open his eyes, but his brows were knitted together in confusion.

"Alli's freaking out about the wedding. I have to go help her."

"No," he whined, "Stay here with me."

"I wish I could, honey," I said, smiling softly at the pout his face held.

"Well you'd better not stay out late. Eight o'clock curfew, young lady."

"Okay, I'll see you then," I whispered, kissing his temple before getting out of bed.

"What am I supposed to do here without you, anyway?" he called from the bed as I disappeared into the closet.

"Call Adam?" I suggested, pulling on a pair of grey pants and a red top.

"Right. I'll do that." I laughed at the tiredness in his voice.

By the time I got out of the bathroom, ready to go, he was fast asleep.

I kissed his head before heading over to Alli's.

After a long day of last minute fittings and confirmations, it was seven thirty and I promised Alli that everything was absolutely perfect.

I left and drove back across town to where I knew Eli was waiting for me.

I walked in and didn't see him.

"Eli?" I called. No answer.

Morty was in the drive, so I knew he had to be here.

I looked down to see rose petals on the floor in front of me, leading out of the living room.

I followed them excitedly, and found myself in the dining room.

The table was set for two, candles lit and roses in a vase in the center.

I sat in the chair that was pulled out, my heart beating rapidly.

Just moments later, Eli walked in holding two plates of food and grinning.

"Dinner is served, m'lady," he said, his smile goofy.

He set one plate in front of me and the other in the spot where he sat.

"You're too sweet," I said softly, leaning in to kiss him before cutting into my food.

This was the future I'd always imagined.

Everything seemed perfect, and I was positive that nothing could bring me down.

_One Month Later…_

"Clare, baby, please let me in? I'm begging you."

Eli weakly pounded on the door as I only sobbed harder.

"Just go away," I breathed, too weak to speak audibly.

"Baby, please!" His voice was so desperate.

I didn't want him to come in.

I didn't want him to know why I was so upset.

I looked down at _it,_ and tears continued to fall from my eyes.

Sure, we're married. It's not like this kind of thing is a big deal to other married couples.

But I just wasn't ready.

My hands shook as I held it.

That stupid incriminating piece of white plastic.

The little pink plus sign that glared up at me made me want to die.

_Okay, so this is where I will begin the tumultuous roller coaster that you should have expected this story to be in the first place (: There will be ups and downs and some surprise turns, so you've been warned!_


	4. Chapter 4

_I love that you guys liked the new direction! Just keep my warning in mind, ups and downs and complete flips… But I don't want to scare you away (x Keep reading and reviewing!_

I was curled up in the tub, shaking.

"Clare," Eli called feebly from the door. "Baby what's wrong?"

I could hear tears in his voice, and he didn't even know what was wrong.

So much for not upsetting him.

"Please," he asked softly.

I cried audibly, now upset that he was upset, on top of what I'd found out two hours ago.

"Did I do something wrong? Are you mad at me? Because I didn't mean to-"

"You didn't do anything wrong," I whispered after cracking the door open.

I had slowly pulled myself out of the tub and walked to the door, unable to hear him in such agony anymore.

He pushed the door open the rest of the way and pulled me to him.

He held me there tightly for a long, long while.

He didn't bother asking what was wrong. All he cared about was that I was beginning to open up.

"Sweetie," he breathed, patting down my hair as I began to release soft sobs into his chest. "It's okay. It's going to be okay. I promise."

"Y-you can't promise that," I choked out.

"Well I don't know what else to tell you without knowing what's going on," he said gently. He led me to the toilet and sat me down on the closed lid, crouching in front of me and looking deep into my puffy red eyes.

I couldn't hold back anymore and I shook as I cried hard.

He stroked my hair and attempted to wipe the tears from my cheeks but more soon came to replace them.

I pointed to the counter where the test sat, causing him to get to his feet to see what I was referring to.

He looked down at the test and his jaw dropped.

His reaction only made me cry harder.

"Oh, baby," he murmured, moving back to me and wrapping his arms around me tightly. "It will be okay, it will all work out."

"H-how can you s-say that?" I wailed into his neck, where I buried my face.

"Clare, just take deep breaths, please," he whispered as his hands soothingly ran up and down my back. "This happens all the time. If you don't want us to keep it, there's always adoption. Or… abortion."

I didn't know what to do.

I was lost.

"Come here, let's get you more comfortable."

He led me out to our room, laying me on the bed gently and moving to lie beside me.

His arms held me tightly and I cried and cried until I fell asleep.

…

As I held my sobbing wife in my arms, I felt many emotions running through me.

When I first saw the positive test, my first reaction was fear.

But after a long while of thinking it over, it didn't seem so bad.

It would be a struggle, but it wasn't the end of the world.

We were married after all.

Many married couples had babies this early into the relationship. It didn't seem all that rare.

But the way Clare took it… crying all afternoon…

I felt like there was a little more to it than just being upset about being pregnant.

And I couldn't help but think that maybe it was because the baby she was pregnant with was _mine_. She had agreed to stay married, and this first month had been absolutely wonderful. But what if getting pregnant made her reconsider things?

I didn't bring it up to her; she was upset enough as it was.

But it ate away at me for the rest of the day.

When she woke up late that evening, she looked so unbelievably sad.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" I asked softly, stroking her tear stained cheek with my thumb.

She just shook her head.

It killed me to see her like this. I couldn't bear it.

"Just hold me," she finally whispered, burying her face in my chest.

We sat in near silence for the rest of the night.

The next morning, she woke up for work at the usual time and went about her normal routine.

I watched her from our bed, my heart breaking at her apparent numbness.

I loved her with everything in me.

It killed me that she was hurting.

"I'm calling the doctor today," she said softly, sitting beside me on the bed before she had to go.

"The doctor?" I asked, taking her hand and playing with it gently.

"Yeah," she nodded. "You know, just to make sure everything's okay…"

"Well I'll go with you," I said giving her hand a little squeeze.

She smiled a soft, weak smile. "Thanks, Eli. You know, I couldn't imagine anyone I'd rather have by my side through all of this."

And with that, every thought in my mind about Clare doubting herself in being with me vanished entirely.

She kissed me goodbye and left for work.

She worked a boring office job from nine to five every weekday.

When I found out what she did for a living, I couldn't help but be a little disappointed. She was so talented and she had so many capabilities.

Filling out paperwork and answering a phone all day was limiting her.

It was holding her back.

But she was saving up for graduate school to pursue her dream of being a college professor.

She may hate her job now, but she was optimistic about the future, and that made me so proud of her.

I guessed that was part of why the pregnancy had hit her so hard.

I'm sure she felt like she would be stuck, unable to do anything for herself or her career.

But I was here for her, and I had to prove that to her.

Without a college education, my job options were limited, but Adam had a buddy who owned a local record shop and he hired me at a generous salary.

I would ask for more hours when I went in today, and if that didn't work I'd consider getting a second job.

I didn't want Clare to have to lift a finger.

I wanted to provide her with any and everything she needed.

She was my wife, and I was going to be there for her, no matter what it took.

I went to work and to my surprise, the owner Max agreed to give me as many hours as I wanted. There was a deadbeat teenager he'd been meaning to fire anyway.

To my surprise, Clare came in at five-thirty that evening.

"Clare!" I said with a warm smile as she walked in.

"Hey, sweetie," she said softly. She approached the counter and leaned on it, facing me.

The store was empty, or else she would have been apprehensive of talking to me during my work shift.

"Is everything okay?" I quickly asked, taking her hand.

"Yeah, but I called the doctor today, and they're completely full for the rest of the week. The earliest I can get in is Monday."

"Well, it's Thursday today, so that's not that bad," I offered. She nodded sadly.

"I'm just anxious. This is all happening so… fast."

"That's kind of how we roll, baby," I said lightly, attempting humor to make her smile.

She just chuckled lightly and shook her head. "I guess you're right. So I'll see you at home in about an hour, right?"

"No, I'm closing tonight. Max gave me extra hours," I explained. "I thought it would help…"

She smiled and gave my hand a squeeze. "That's really thoughtful of you, Eli. So that means you'll be home around eight, right?"

"Right," I nodded.

We bade each other goodbye and she disappeared out the door.

I finished the rest of the slow shift and closed shop about fifteen minutes early, wanting to get home to Clare.

As I pulled up to our house, I saw that all of the lights were off.

I walked inside and heard nothing.

When I reached our room, I expected Clare to be asleep.

However, she greeted me with a small smile as she looked away from the softly playing television.

I undressed until I was only in my boxers, throwing my clothes in the hamper that sat in the corner of our room.

"I've trained you well," she said with a soft giggle.

"You sure have," I said with a grin as I slid under the covers beside her.

"I really missed you today," she murmured, instinctively sliding her arms around my waist.

I rested an arm around her shoulders and held her closer. "I missed you too."

"Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. I got a raise today," she said, her eyes meeting mine.

"That's great, baby," I said with a grin, leaning down to connect our lips in a kiss.

She smiled into the kiss, before pulling back to continue.

"Between my raise and your extra hours, maybe we'll be able to put some money back."

"See, we're going to be fine," I whispered, kissing the top of her head softly.

"I know, it's just so hard not to get freaked out," she muttered, relaxing into my body.

"I know, sweetie. I can't even imagine what you're going through right now…"

"What about you?" she asked suddenly. "What are you feeling about all of this?"

"Well," I started, forming my thoughts into words. "Well it's scary as fuck, I'm not going to lie, but it's also… exciting. I mean, you're carrying my baby. It just makes all of this seem that much more real. I love my life with you, Clare. And even though it will be hard, having a baby will only make it that much better."

She sighed softly as her grip around me tightened, just a bit.

I felt moisture on my chest and realized there were tears coming from her eyes.

"Did I say something to upset you? Are you okay?" I asked tenderly, lifting her chin to look into her eyes.

She smiled weakly, "Yeah, I'm fine. I just… You don't know how amazing you are, Elijah Goldsworthy. I just wish I were as brave as you…"

"You are, Clare. You're even braver. You're the strongest person I know, and this will only make you stronger."

"I love you so much," she whispered, smiling as I wiped her tears away with the pad of my thumb.

"I love you too, sweetheart."

The next day was uneventful, and I had to close again at work, our hours being later on Fridays and Saturdays.

By the time I got home at half past midnight Clare was already sleeping deeply.

I fell asleep after a few restless hours of watching television.

Clare shaking me awake pulled me from my sleep the next morning.

"Eli, sweetheart, wake up," she murmured as I stirred sleepily.

"What's wrong?" I asked, opening my eyes as my brows pinned together.

"Nothing, but it's nearly eleven. My dad will be here at noon… he's coming for lunch." She bustled about the room in a frenzy, disappearing into my closet and coming out with a nice pair of jeans she'd taken me to buy along with a clean white t-shirt and a clean blazer.

"Put this on," she said quickly before hurrying into the bathroom.

"Wait, your dad's coming?" I called after her, quickly growing anxious.

"Yeah, he surprised me with a phone call this morning. He said he wants to catch up with me one on one. Well, with the exception of you. He wants to get to know you better, that's what he said. I just hope this goes well…"

"Yeah, me too," I breathed, pulling myself out from under the covers and pulling on the clothes she had brought.

I joined her in the bathroom and brushed through my hair, which was slightly matted from sleep.

She took the brush from me and handed me my toothbrush, toothpaste already on it.

She stood behind me and brushed my hair as I began to brush my teeth.

"Are you okay with this? I mean, I know you must think it's really awkward. I'm really sorry, I wanted this time to come when you were ready for it, not when he just came and invited himself over…"

"I'm fine, Clare," I said, my voice muffled by the suds in my mouth.

She smiled and kissed my cheek softly, hugging me from behind before disappearing once more.

Once I was ready, I found her in the kitchen making lunchmeat sandwiches.

We hadn't been grocery shopping in a while, so we didn't have much to choose from.

"Honey, will you go to the store and get us some chips and something to drink?" she asked, her eyes nervous.

"Of course," I said leaning in to kiss her. I started to look for the keys to my hearse, but she was too anxious for that.

"Take my car, the keys are hanging over there."

I took her keys from the hook and opened the door to the garage.

"I love you," I called back.

"Love you too," she replied, breathless.

I went to the store closest to our house and picked two kinds of chips and two different two liters, wanting to please everyone.

I got back and her dad's car was already parked there.

"Eli, nice to see you again," he greeted me the moment I stepped inside.

I set the grocery bags down and quickly moved over to shake his hand.

"Nice to see you too, sir," I replied with a smile.

To my surprise, he smiled back.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Clare breathe a sigh of relief.

"Let's eat," she said softly, guiding us into the dining room and bringing the chips and two liters with her.

She already had plates of sandwiches set out and cups of ice.

She was adorable when she was nervous and wanted everything to be perfect.

"This is lovely, Clare-bear," her dad said with a grin.

"Thanks, dad," she answered.

"So, how's married life been treating you two?" he asked, looking back and forth between us.

"It's been great," Clare answered with a small smile. "I'm sorry about how things ended last time…"

"Don't be sorry, honey. I wanted to make up for that today. It was all the fault of your mother and I. You were right, we don't know how to be mature, and we often times put you in the middle of it all. I just wanted you to know I'm willing to make an effort to remain close to you. And, if this young man makes you happy," he looked to me and nodded respectfully, "I'm willing to give him a chance."

"That means a lot, sir," I said with a smile.

"Yeah, thanks, daddy," Clare said with a grin.

"It's the least I can do for my baby girl."

We spent the rest of lunch talking, Clare and her dad catching up and he and I getting to know each other all over again.

He really seemed to approve of our being together. It was a relief.

"I've spoken to your mother, and just so you know, she's still livid about you two," he said as he was walking out the door. "Fair warning."

Clare rolled her eyes and sighed, "Thanks, dad. I'll keep that in mind."

"I love you, Clare-bear," he said as he pulled his daughter into a hug. He extended his hand to me, "And nice to see you, Eli. It really was a pleasure talking to you."

"Pleasure was mine, sir," I replied, shaking his hand firmly.

"Sir? Hell, call me dad," he said with a warm smile.

Dad.

I missed my dad more than words could say. I missed both of my parents so much.

Clare's dad establishing that relationship with me really made me respect him and appreciate him on a whole new level.

When we closed the door and went to clear the dining room, I saw Clare's eyes glistening with tears.

"That was so sweet," she whispered, laughing at herself. "I know I'm a sap, no need to make fun of me for it."

"I wasn't going to," I said with a smirk. "It was really great of him. He's a great dad to you, I hope I can be just as great."

"You'll be better," she said, moving to me and hugging me tightly. "And we'll be together forever, no divorce bullshit."

I smiled, leaning into her. "Forever. That sounds nice."


	5. Chapter 5

_So I'm going out of town for the holiday, and I won't have the internet there. So sadly, no updates until at least Sunday. Hold tight and review until then? And, sorry for this…_

"I'm sorry it's such short notice, but my mom surprised me with the tickets and you did say anytime we needed a babysitter…"

Fiona was on the phone, pleading me to babysit tonight.

"Short notice? Fiona, it's in two hours. I just don't know..."

"Oh come on. It will be great practice!"

"What are you talking about?" I blurted, my voice urgent.

We hadn't told anyone about the pregnancy yet, wanting to wait until after the doctor's appointment when we were sure everything was fine.

"I'm only joking, Clare. Calm down! I meant for when and if you decide to have a baby in the future."

"Oh," I said, breathing a sigh of relief.

"You're being so weird today," she said with a laugh. "But really, will you? Please?"

"Alright," I said, finally breaking.

"Thank you thank you thank you!" she nearly yelled into the phone. I told her I'd be there at five thirty to give them time to get to the show early.

"What was that all about?" Eli asked from where he sat reading on the couch.

"I'm babysitting Hugo tonight," I said, plopping down beside him with a sigh.

"Well why so down? It'll be fun, and I'll go with you if you want. I'd love to see the little guy again."

I smiled at him gratefully and nodded, "That would be great, Eli. Do I tell you enough how amazing you are?"

"It's always nice to hear," he replied with a smirk.

I laughed and ruffled his hair before standing to go upstairs.

"I'll be down soon, then we can head that way," I said softly as I walked up the stairs.

As I got ready in our bathroom, I thought about the future.

It completely terrified me, and even though things were looking up, I didn't know how I'd be able to do it.

True, I loved knowing that Eli would be by my side through all of this; I couldn't have asked for anyone better.

But something still felt… off. I wasn't completely convinced that this was what I wanted.

"Took you long enough," he murmured without looking up from the pages of the book in his lap.

"I was thinking. It distracted me," I answered thoughtfully.

"About what?" he asked, now closing his book and devoting his attention to me.

"What do you think?" I asked with a raised brow.

"Of course," he said with a nod of his head.

He stood to join me and wrapped his arms around me tightly.

"Can you believe me when I tell you that everything will be fine? More than fine, perfect actually. You're going to be a great mom, Clare, and I'm going to do everything within my power to be the best dad that baby could ever have."

He placed his hand gently on my stomach, and my heart beat wildly.

"You're perfect," I whispered, looking up at him in awe.

"That would be you, my dear," he said with a smirk before capturing my lips with his.

My phone pulled us from our passionate embrace, both of us a little breathless.

"Hello?" I murmured into my cell phone.

"Are you on your way?" I heard an excited Fiona ask.

"Almost. We'll be there in ten."

"Okay, hurry!"

I laughed as I hung up, and taking Eli's hand in mine I led us out to my car.

Once parked in front of the mansion that was our best friends' home, we got out and were greeted at the door by a suit wearing Adam.

"Looking sharp," Eli said with a smirk.

"Shut up. She made me wear this penguin suit." Adam rolled his eyes.

"No, it really looks good," I said with a laugh, slapping Eli in the arm.

"Whatever. The baby's taking a nap right now, but he'll be waking up anytime now to eat. There are jars of baby food in the… Hell, why am I even bothering? You know what to do, Clare."

I smiled and nodded at him, "Everything will be under control."

Fiona descended from the stairs, her dress stunning.

"How do I look? Is it nice enough?" she asked once she joined us at the bottom. She self-consciously patted her hair and smoothed out her dress.

"You look amazing," Adam said sweetly, looking her over before kissing her cheek lightly.

She blushed, smiling widely.

"Thanks so much again for coming on such short notice."

"No problem, you kids have fun," Eli said as we heard a honk from out front.

"That must be Geoff with the limo," Fiona said lightly, "We'll see you tonight!"

We bid them goodbye and soon were left with each other in their house.

"The limo?" Eli asked with a raised brow.

"That's Fiona for you," I said with a smile. I leaned into him and pulled his face down to mine for a kiss.

"Tonight should be interesting," he said once we had pulled apart.

"That's for sure," I said with a nod. "But Hugo is pretty much the most perfect baby ever."

We went upstairs when we heard the baby crying. I picked him up and held him against me, swaying back and forth to soothe him.

Eli followed me downstairs and into the kitchen, and I told him where to get the jars of baby food.

He found them and got one out, and with my direction heated it the right way and set it on the high chair.

I told him where to get a bib as I sat Hugo in the high chair.

He reached for the jar of food immediately but I pulled it back quickly, laughing softly.

Eli brought the bib over and put it on the baby.

I fed him the first few bites of his food, and we both smiled at the way he opened his mouth wide when he wanted more.

"Do you want to try?" I asked, offering the spoon to Eli.

He looked nervous, but didn't disagree.

He took the spoon from me and put a small amount of the mushy food on it.

When he went to feed it to Hugo, the baby accidentally spit the food out and it ran down his face.

Eli scooped it back up with the spoon and again attempted to feed Hugo, this time with success.

"See, you're a natural," I said with a grin as I watched him interact with the baby.

We spent the next twenty minutes feeding the baby, and I cleaned his sticky face and hands when he was all done.

"What do we do now?" Eli asked, looking at me nervously.

"We play," I said with a smile, taking Hugo in my arms and heading back up the stairs.

In his room, we sat on the floor and played with him for what seemed like hours.

We played peek-a-boo, we watched as he chewed on different toys and eventually threw all of them across the room.

We laughed as he crawled speedily around the room, exploring every inch of it.

My heart nearly melted when Eli would take him in his arms and tickle him gently, both boys laughing in the most adorable way.

When Hugo finally began to yawn, too tired to play anymore, we turned on one of the DVDs Fiona had for him to watch.

We sat on the couch in the upstairs entertainment room, Hugo in Eli's arms nearly asleep.

The way the night had gone and the way Eli had been so perfect with Hugo had helped me tremendously.

I now realized that I really did want a baby.

Even if it would make life a little harder, it would be worth it.

It would be worth it to start my family with the man I loved more than anything.

I knew without a doubt in my mind that I was ready.

A little while after Hugo fell asleep, we lay him in his crib and returned to the couch in the entertainment room. We turned on a movie that sounded vaguely interesting to us both and relaxed into each other to watch it.

"Tonight was just what I needed," I murmured as I played with Eli's hand.

"How so?" he asked gently, pressing a kiss to the top of my head.

"Well, I'm sure now. I know that this is exactly what I want. And it's exciting to me."

He was silent for a moment, suddenly making me anxious.

When I looked up at him, he was looking straight back at me. A look I couldn't quite describe was on his face as his eyes bore into mine.

"Clare, you don't know how happy you've made me," he breathed.

"You've made me happy too, Eli," I answered, stroking his cheek.

"No, you've not only made me happy, but you've completely turned my life around. You've given me a reason to keep on going. You've made me whole again. I have a future and a family now. All thanks to you. I love you so much, Clare."

I was breathless, blown away more and more every day I spent with this man.

"I-I love you too," was all I could stutter.

He smiled and pressed his lips to mine gently.

As we watched the movie, we would take a break every so often to share more kisses.

I was living the perfect life.

Adam and Fiona got home about an hour later, and Eli and I returned home to sleep.

The next morning when I woke up, I realized it was Monday.

It was time for the doctor's visit.

I got ready as usual, the only difference in Eli getting ready with me.

My hands shook as I buttoned my shirt, and he helped me with the rest of it.

"What's wrong?" he asked with concern in his voice.

"I'm scared. What if… what if something's wrong with the baby?" I bit my lip, holding back the tears that would come if I thought too extensively about it.

"Clare, nothing is going to be wrong with the baby. Don't even let yourself think those things. It's going to be okay, I promise."

His words calmed me a little, and I was able to finish getting ready.

He drove us to the doctor's office and helped me check in.

The waiting room was agonizing.

We waited for nearly an hour, my anxiety growing by the minute.

"Clare Goldsworthy?" A nurse asked from the doorway.

Eli and I stood, following her down a narrow hall.

She did all of the standard procedures, height, weight, blood pressure, and then left us to wait for the doctor.

That wait was even more agonizing than the last one, though it was shorter.

Thirty minutes later, a smiling middle-aged woman came through the doors.

She explained to me that she would be taking some blood samples and she would also be giving me an ultrasound to check on the baby.

After the blood work, she gave me a gown to change into and left the room to let me do so.

She brought Eli and I into an ultrasound room and I was instructed to lie on the reclined chair.

She squeezed the agonizingly cold gel on my stomach, and began to move the sensor around.

The look on her face was one of confusion, making me panic. 

"Wh-what's wrong?" I asked, squeezing Eli's hand.

"How many pregnancy tests did you take?" she asked, looking down at me.

"Just one. Why, what's wrong? Is the baby okay?"

"Clare, I'm sorry. I think you experienced a false positive."

Just like that, my world collapsed.

I stared at her in shock, no words forming in my mouth because no words were forming in my head.

No baby. False positive. That's all that I thought.

"Are you serious? That can't be-" Eli was cut off by the doctor.

"I'm sorry, but I'm afraid that must have been what happened. "

She continued talking, but I didn't hear.

My eyes burned with tears as I sat there and stared up at my empty body on the screen.

I was wordless for the rest of the visit, Eli doing all of the talking for me and not once letting go of my hand.

I was also silent the whole car ride home.

It wasn't until we reached our bedroom that I broke down into sobs.

Eli held me tightly, whispering comforting words in my ear, but I continued to cry.

I had finally come to terms with my pregnancy, then come to find out it didn't exist in the first place.

I should have known I wasn't pregnant.

It had been stupid of me to think that there would have been a way to be.

I was on the pill, I had been for years.

It was nearly impossible to get pregnant on the pill.

I cursed my stupidity and continued to cry against my husband.

He pulled me down to lay back on the bed, holding me tight as I shook beneath his arms.

We remained there for hours and hours.

I looked up at Eli through my eyes, blurred with tears, and saw tears of his own falling down his cheeks.

He wiped my wet face with his thumbs and brought me up to kiss him.

We continued to hold each other, each of us broken.

By the time the sky had turned dark, I had stopped crying and I simply felt numb.

Eli didn't say a word, respecting my need for silence.

Finally, I brought myself to speak to him.

"I can't believe this," I breathed.

"Me neither," he answered solemnly.

"I really wanted a baby," I said, my voice cracking.

"Me too," he whispered.

As I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the tears I felt coming to stay back, he leaned up slightly and turned my face to look at him.

"But Clare, we can still try. If you really want to have a baby, we can try."

"You mean it?" I breathed, "I mean, you're sure?"

"I'd love nothing more than to have a baby with you, Clare. If that's really what you want too, I think we should give it a try."

"It is really what I want," I said shakily.

"Then let's make a baby," he said gently, smiling weakly at me.

I forced a smile upon my lips, and I knew it must have looked pathetic, but his eyes brightened when he saw it.

He kissed me gently, holding my face in his hands.

I matched the movements of his lips, letting my body relax completely into his.

When I felt his tongue I parted my lips, whimpering as he gently probed my mouth.

He laid me on my back, careful not to be rough.

We kissed softly for the long moments that followed.

Slowly, I unbuttoned his shirt and slid it over his shoulders.

He removed it the rest of the way, his hands soon working at my buttons.

I then fumbled with his jeans, my hands too shaky to undo the tight button.

He aided me when my shirt lay open.

As he undid his jeans, I leaned up to remove my shirt.

He undid my pants and pulled them off.

We pressed our nearly naked bodies together tightly.

When we kissed, we kissed desperately.

Both of us were feeling so many things at that moment. We needed each other.

He unclasped my bra and tossed it away.

I pulled his boxers down as he did the same to my underwear.

His kisses turned soft, tender.

He gently parted my legs, kneeling between them and pressing his lips to mine as he pushed himself inside of me.

As he slowly and steadily moved in and out, I grasped his shoulders tightly.

I moaned softly as he pushed himself deeper.

As he worked up the pace he too let out a groan, causing my nails to dig into his skin.

He kissed my lips repeatedly and murmured sweet nothings against them.

His angle was just right, and I already felt myself reaching my peak.

I moaned again as his breathing became rugged.

Picking up pace even more, I felt his muscles clench beneath my hands and I let out one last loud moan as I felt myself release.

The way he groaned and closed his eyes tight let me know he too had come.

We panted unevenly, holding each other as he fell to the bed beside me.

"Clare?" he breathed before placing a kiss to my forehead.

"Yes, Eli?" I asked softly, my eyes closed.

"Everything's going to be fine. Not just fine, perfect. I promise you. I'll do anything and everything it takes to make you happy, okay?"

My eyes fluttered open and I studied his face.

Every feature was so sincere.

He brought a small smile to my lips.

"Okay. I know you will, and I believe you."

_Uhm… Yeah… Don't hate me? But let me know what you think. This is definitely a down, but keep in mind that not all hope is lost (: See you Sunday!_


	6. Chapter 6

_Well that was the break from hell. Sorry, there were flight delays and I only just got back to town this morning. I haven't been neglecting this story or you all! Again, sorry for that last update. To reward your wait, this is a happy one (: It's more like a filler, not too long or substantial. But I think we all need a little lightheartedness! Read and Review, I love to know what you think (: _

"Damn, I'm going to be late!" I muttered after eyeing the clock that sat on the nightstand.

"Just call in," Clare whispered, wrapping her arms and legs around me and pulling me to her unclothed body.

"You're a bad influence," I said smiling down at her. I reluctantly pulled myself from her grasp and stood beside the bed, entirely unclothed myself. "But really, I have to get going."

She pouted up at me and I couldn't restrain the pained look that came to my face.

I wanted nothing more than to crawl right back into bed with her.

We'd found ourselves caught in the heat of the moment when I came home for my break.

We had been trying for about three weeks to have a baby.

Nothing had changed, and she still wasn't pregnant as far as we knew, but we were having a lot of fun and growing a lot closer in the process.

It wasn't rare for us to find ourselves tangled in the covers on a lazy afternoon, or up in the middle of the night hot and sweaty and satisfied.

I pulled my eyes from the woman I loved and tripped over a shoe as I tried to piece together my scattered clothes.

She giggled from the bed and as I pulled on my boxers, I grinned lazily at her.

"I love you," she murmured, staring up at me with those beautiful eyes of hers.

"I love you too," I said back, walking over to her as I pulled on my blazer, the last article of clothing.

I leaned over and kissed her gently before hurrying out the bedroom door.

"I'll see you tonight!" I called back as I descended the stairs.

"Bye, sweetie," she called back.

I arrived at work exactly three minutes after I was to be back.

The place was very relaxed, and they wouldn't have cared if I'd been half an hour late.

But I didn't want to make any bad impressions. I was gaining favor with the owner and well on my way to a management position.

"Sir, excuse me. Do you think I can speak to the owner of this place? The employees here look like shit, and it's really throwing the vibe of this place."

I looked up to see Adam and I laughed at his satisfied smirk.

"Fuck off," I said jokingly, laughing lightly. "What brings you up here anyway?"

"Fiona took Hugo on a play date and I was bored at home. And I know that you probably scare off any potential customers, so I figured I'd come keep you company."

"Very funny. But thanks, it gets pretty boring up here," I said, agreeing with him a bit.

"So how are things on the home front?" he asked, mindlessly looking through a selection of CDs beside the front counter.

I sat on the other side tapping my fingers on the surface.

"Pretty great actually," I said enthusiastically, nodding for emphasis. "Clare's great, life's great."

"Good to hear. Any… success?" he asked, raising a brow at me. I'd told him about our plan to get pregnant.

"Not yet," I said shaking my head, "But it hasn't even been a month yet so we're not stressed about it. We're just having fun in the process."

"Yeah, I'll bet," he said with a smirk as he looked back down at the CDs.

We talked more about life, how things were going for him, how it was being a father, and other things of the same sort.

Eventually, between the coming and going of occasional customers, we got off on a conversation about music.

"That's the only concert I've ever gone to, actually," he admitted of the Dead Hand concert we'd attended over six years ago.

"No shit," I said, shaking my head. "Really?" When he nodded, I shrugged, "Well it was a pretty fucking awesome one, so that makes up for your lack of musical culture."

"Oh, I'm cultured. I'm cultured with opera. With Broadway. With symphonies."

He rolled his eyes.

"Ah, the joys of being Miss Coyne's one and only."

"Well, I love her. I'd go pretty much anywhere she dragged me."

"I'm really happy for you, man. You deserve this."

Adam really was one of the best people I knew, and he deserved to be happy.

"You deserve what's coming your way too," he said with a grin. "Man, you'll love being a dad. It's… It's really the greatest pride I've ever felt."

He didn't have to convince me.

I was more than ready to start a family with Clare.

He left just about an hour before I had to close up the store, so I began to straighten up early.

After locking up five minutes early, I got into Morty and drove home.

When I arrived, the lights all appeared to be off.

I walked inside and saw that it was indeed pitch black.

I set my jacket down on the couch just as I felt a pair of small hands over my eyes.

"Guess who?" she asked breathily in my ear.

I smirked and placed my hands over hers before bringing them down and turning to her.

She wore a robe and smirked devilishly.

"What are you up to?" I asked with a raised brow.

"You'll see," she murmured, turning and leaving me in the dark as she walked up the stairs slowly.

I followed, walking further and further into the darkness.

When we arrived at our bedroom, I saw the flickering of light from the crack under the door.

When she opened it, I saw that there were lit candles everywhere, illuminating the room with beautiful lighting.

She said nothing as she let the robe drop softly to the floor, revealing a sexy little black and red lacy bra with matching panties.

I smirked as she crawled into bed and I soon followed.

Just as I began to get into the bed beside her, she shook her head.

"No clothes," she said with that gleam in her eyes.

I undressed before her, smirking as her eyes fell shyly over my body.

When every article of clothing was removed, I finally got into bed and stopped just inches from her, our eyes locked fiercely.

She placed her hands flat against my chest and let them slide down, her nails dragging lightly over my skin.

I placed my hands on her shoulders and gently guided her down to a lying position.

She bit her lip as she stared up at me, now innocent. I only smirked.

One of my hands found its way to her breasts, dipping down between them to unclasp the bra after gently groping her.

She moaned softly as I pushed away the bra and moved my hands over her bare breasts.

I worked my way down her torso to her panties and I slowly slid them down her legs, which parted more by the second.

Once we were both undressed, I situated myself between her legs and gently rubbed myself against her.

Our lips met and moved at a slow, steady rhythm.

Her hands tangled into my hair, as I wasted no time in pushing my cock into her.

I matched my pace with the rhythm of our kisses.

She moaned, bucking her hips hard against mine and biting my lip.

I became a little more reckless with my thrusts, hitting her harder every time I pushed myself further inside.

Her breath hitched, turning me on even more.

She let her hands roam freely about my body, her touches making my skin tingle.

I groaned at the feeling of her warm, wet core around me.

Conceiving a child was quickly becoming my favorite decision we'd ever made.

"Oh… Eli…" she breathed, her eyes closed and her head tilted back.

I leaned down and kissed her neck repeatedly, my tongue and teeth working with my lips to earn moans from her lips.

"E-Eli!" she breathed once more, her voice trembling as I felt her tighten around me.

"Yeah, Clare," I mumbled against her skin, keeping up my movements inside of her.

She let out a long moan as she came beneath me, my hands brushing back her hair gently as I admired her beauty.

She was the most wonderful woman in the world, and she was all mine.

My thrusts died down to a slow pace once more and she lazily matched my movements with her hips.

Her fingers tugged roughly at my hair, making me groan.

She smirked up at me, her hands finding my shoulders and grabbing them forcefully.

Before I knew it I was being pushed down to the bed and Clare was situated above me.

As she rode me back and forth, my eyes fell closed and I moaned her name at the feeling.

My hands guided her hips back and forth as her movements pushed me closer and closer to my release.

"Fuck… Clare…" I grunted, bucking my hips and causing her to whimper.

She moved faster above me and as a string of moans formed in her throat, I finally let myself go.

I held her tightly as I came inside of her, my hips moving desperately beneath hers.

When I was done and my movements had ceased, she pulled herself from me and fell to the bed beside me.

"God I love you," I said softly, holding her close to me.

"I love you too," she answered, a smile apparent in her voice.

We enjoyed the silence, the atmosphere, and the feeling of being together for the hour that followed.

I fell in and out of sleep, Clare's hands caressing my body feeling amazing.

Finally I rolled over on my side, facing her and resting my head against hers.

I placed my hand softly on her stomach and smiled.

"Just think, maybe there's a baby in there."

"Yeah… Maybe…" she breathed, smiling softly as she pressed her lips to mine. "Eli, I don't thank you enough."

"What do you have to thank me for?" I asked, raising a brow at her.

"For being here for me. For supporting me. For being the best husband any girl could ever ask for. For wanting to start a family with me. For being a damn good lover." She giggled as I raised my brows at her last comment.

"Well a thanks isn't needed, because you deserve all of that and more. But I'm glad that you feel that way. I just so happen to think that you're the best wife any man would be lucky to have, you're the most intelligent, beautiful, perfect woman in the world, and if I do say so myself, you're the sexiest thing I've ever laid eyes on, and fucking _amazing_ at making love."

I smirked as a dark red flushed her cheeks.

"So… I was thinking," she started, sliding closer to me.

"I love the way you think," I murmured, kissing her cheek.

"Want to go for round two?" she asked, pressing her body to mine and biting her lip.

"As I said," I breathed, a smirk set upon my lips, "I _love_ the way you think."


	7. Chapter 7

_Sorry for the time skips, I know I've done that multiple times in this story. I just want this to stay interesting and it would just be a lot of fillers. OH, so yesterday I got an idea for yet another story I want to write (Eclare, of course). And if it didn't sound like so much fun for me, I'd push it aside. But I _really_ want to write it! I'm just not sure I'd be able to update as often as normal if I added yet another story to my list right now… What do you all think? Also, let me know what you think of the update? Please and thankyou (:_

Though she never said anything about it, I knew Clare was starting to worry.

It had been almost three months since we'd started trying to get pregnant.

While these things do take time, it was taking quite a bit.

We were both exhausted and were feeling worse with each new day.

We had found out a few weeks prior that Darcy and her husband in Kenya were expecting, which didn't make things easier on Clare.

I walked into the house late Saturday night, after closing the store.

I heard the faint sound of crying coming from upstairs.

Her pain made me physically hurt.

I walked up to our bedroom and quietly opened the door.

She was lying beneath the covers, curled up in a ball.

Her hair was a mess around her head, and tears streamed freely down her cheeks.

I walked over to the side of the bed and knelt down facing her.

Her eyes fluttered open when I brushed the tears from her cheek.

She opened her mouth to speak, but I placed a finger over her lips to silence her.

Her eyes were grateful.

I pulled down the blankets to see that she was still fully dressed in her clothes from the day.

I unbuttoned her shirt and she leaned up so I could push it off of her shoulders.

While she leaned forward, I also reached around and unhooked her bra, bringing it off of her shoulders as well.

I slid her skirt down her legs and took it along with the rest of her clothes to the hamper.

She sat up when I brought an old t-shirt of mine and she lifted her arms for me to slide it onto her.

I pulled off my shirt and kicked off my shoes before sliding into bed beside her and immediately taking her in my arms.

"It's never going to happen, is it?" she asked sadly, her voice a low whisper.

"Don't say that, baby," I murmured, smoothing down her hair. "It will happen when the time is right."

"Alli called about an hour ago. She's pregnant," she said in the same sad voice.

"I'm so sorry," was all I could say. I felt so helpless, not knowing what to say to make her feel better.

She sighed as she relaxed into me a little more.

"I don't know. Maybe it's not meant to be."

"Don't say that," I said as I shook my head.

"We're so young though, Eli. It should be easy to get pregnant. What if… what if something's wrong? With…"

Her voice faded as I felt a tear on my bare chest.

She was exactly right.

What if there was something wrong? I know she thought the problem was with her; she blamed no one but herself.

But what if the problem was with me? That was common, lack of conception being at the fault of the man.

I was suddenly overwhelmed with a feeling of guilt and self-doubt.

What if all of this was my fault?

She looked up at me and the look in her eyes killed me.

"We could… schedule a doctor's appointment. If that would help."

"It really would," she answered in a small voice before placing her lips gently against mine.

She relaxed back onto the bed next to me and exhaustedly drifted off to sleep.

I lay awake, terrified of what we may find out.

If this was all my fault, I wouldn't be able to live with myself.

…

I got an appointment first thing Monday morning.

Eli said he could get off of work, and I knew I had plenty of sick days to spare.

I just there was something wrong with me.

As each day passed, I had become more and more desperate.

I wanted nothing more than to start a family with Eli, and it really seemed like that was never going to happen.

I heard my phone ring as I tried to nap that afternoon, and I saw it was Alli.

I didn't answer.

It rang again just a few minutes later, and I knew she wouldn't stop.

"Hello?" I answered softly.

"Clare! Hey it's me. I was wondering if you wanted to go get coffee. Jenna's bringing little Charlie, and Fiona's bringing little Hugo!"

Nothing sounded worse to me.

"I don't think so, Alli. I'm-"

"No, you're not busy, Clare," she interrupted. "You're coming! Be at the Dot in an hour."

She hung up before I could protest.

The last thing I needed was to see Jenna's adorable curly haired six year old or Fiona's precious angel of a baby.

And I really didn't need to hear of how excited Alli was to be pregnant.

No one knew what I was going through. I didn't want to bring everyone down when things were looking so up for everyone.

"Hey, sweetie," I said with a soft smile when Eli walked in the door for his lunch break.

"Hey," he said quietly, leaning down to kiss me. "How are you?"

"Shitty," I said simply. He raised his brows at my cursing. "I have to go see Jenna and Fiona and Alli and the kids," I elaborated.

"Oh," he breathed. "I'm sorry."

His face looked so pained.

I hated this.

It was all my fault, I knew it. We would never be truly happy because of me.

"It's alright," I answered softly.

He sat beside me and we lay comfortably in one another's arms for the moments that followed.

Had it been a few months previous, we would be anxious to jump each other's bones. We would make love every chance we got. We would both be spontaneous and excited.

But now, we were tired and frustrated and depressed.

I hated how this was taking a toll on us.

It wasn't taking a toll on our strength as a couple, but it was taking a toll on each of us emotionally.

Eli turned my face to his gently and kissed my lips.

I kissed back, desperate for the feeling of him.

He was the single thing that could make me feel better, especially at a time like this.

After slow, sad moments filled with kissing each other and holding each other and inward crying, it was time for each of us to go.

I kissed him goodbye as we each got in our separate cars and left.

At the Dot, the look of my three happy friends made my heart hurt.

I wanted the happiness they had.

"Clare!" Alli called.

"Clare!" Charlie echoed cutely. Everyone laughed, so I forced a smile.

I hugged my friends and sat with them, ordering a simple black coffee.

They talked animatedly about their kids and how much they loved them and how excited they all were for Alli and about how complete their lives felt with their kids.

It hurt me so much that I couldn't stand it.

"Clare, you're being so quiet!" Fiona said lightly.

"Sorry," I said softly, forcing a smile.

"Are you okay?" Jenna asked as she ruffled Charlie's hair.

"I'm fine," I said with a nod. "Really."

No one mentioned my sad demeanor for the rest of the time and we were together.

Finally, after the longest afternoon of my life, we parted ways and I went home to an empty house.

I pulled on Eli's shirt that I'd worn the night before and sighed at the smell of him overwhelming me.

He comforted me so much, he really had no idea.

I fell asleep long before he came home.

I only stirred lightly when I felt him crawl into bed with me and hold me tightly against him.

…

Clare's bustling around the room woke me up the next morning.

I realized why she was so anxious; we would be going to the doctor today.

I got up and kissed her good morning before pulling on my nicest jeans and a black and red plaid shirt.

We got ready side by side in the bathroom, not speaking but every so often holding each other in a comforting embrace.

Before we left, I stopped her at the door.

"No matter what happens, everything will be fine. Even if something's wrong, there are always options. And I'm here with you through it all."

A few tears fell from her eyes but a smile found her lips.

"How do you know exactly what I need to hear when I need to hear it? Thank you, Eli. I love you so much."

"I love you too," I murmured, kissing her gently before guiding her to her car.

I drove us to the doctor's office, the trip there taking an eternity.

Once inside, we waited.

We waited for half an hour before our names were called.

We talked with a doctor about our problem, and she told us she would test us for various complications.

I was led into one room while Clare was led into another.

They needed a semen sample from me, which was awkward and nerve-racking all at once.

When I was done and led back into the doctor's office, Clare was not yet back.

I was rejoined fifteen minutes later by Clare and the doctor.

"The lab and the x-ray results will be back within the week, and at that point I'll let you know if there are any issues preventing conception."

We nodded and thanked her before leaving.

"That was terrifying," Clare breathed as we were on our way home.

"I know," I murmured. "Clare, I'm sorry. I just… I can't help but feel like this is my fault. So I'm really sorry…"

"Eli, don't say that. It's my fault, I'm sure of it. Nothing is wrong with you… You're perfect."

"You're the perfect one," I said, taking her hand and squeezing it.

"Let's just agree to not blame ourselves. And whatever happens, happens."

"That sounds like a great plan," I said with a small, sincere smile.

We arrived at the house and realized we had the rest of the day off from work.

As I shut the front door behind me, I saw that she started to head towards the kitchen.

I ran to catch up and grabbed her arm from behind.

She turned to look at me questioningly.

"I want you to relax," I explained, leading her over to the couch.

I pushed her to sit down on the couch and handed her the remote.

Disappearing into the kitchen, I pulled out noodles and sauce to make spaghetti.

As I waited for the water to boil, I walked back in to see Clare half-heartedly watching the crime show on TV.

I leaned over the couch behind her and kissed her cheek.

She smiled, turning her head and catching my lips with hers just before I stood.

I smiled into the kiss, my hands smoothing down her soft curls.

"I love you," she whispered when we had finally broken apart.

"I love you too," I answered with a sincere smile.

I went back to the kitchen and saw that the water was boiling, so I poured the noodles in. I pulled out another pan and poured the sauce in and put that over heat as well.

It wasn't much, all pretty much instant, but I wanted Clare to relax today.

When it was all ready, I made our plates and brought them into the living room.

I set them down on the coffee table and disappeared one last time to get each of us a glass of water.

"Thanks, Eli," she said when I returned.

"Not a problem, Clare," I said gently, kissing her forehead before taking my plate and eating.

We both watched TV in silence as we ate, just enjoying each other's company.

"I don't even know how long it's been since we actually spent a whole uninterrupted day together," Clare murmured, looking at me with a sad smile.

"I know… I'm sorry I've been working so much, I just really want to contribute. I want to support you. But not getting to see you as much as I-"

She placed a finger to my lips to silence me.

"Eli, you're rambling. I didn't mean I was upset about it. I just meant that it's nice."

I smiled and shook my head.

"Sorry, I just feel… Lately I've just felt like I need to justify everything."

"I know exactly what you mean," she said placing a hand on mine.

We put both of our empty plates on the coffee table and relaxed into each other's arms.

"For the rest of the day, can we not talk about babies? Can we just try to relax and enjoy each other? Like…like we used to?"

Clare looked up at me with those big, beautiful eyes and it made my heart melt.

"Of course," I answered. "That sounds absolutely wonderful."

We kissed softly, only to pick up speed just moments later.

I eased her back onto the couch and positioned myself above her.

"Oh, does this bring back memories," she said with a small giggle, referring to our study sessions turned wild back in high school. We had spent many a good time on both this couch and the one at my house.

I smirked and pressed my lips to hers, hard.

As one thing led to another, articles of clothing began to be removed.

Soon, nothing separated us.

Naked body on naked body, we kissed. The kisses were filled with longing. With sadness and happiness all at once. With a certain desperation.

Clare moaned as she pressed her hips against mine. I took the hint and slowly glided into her.

She didn't let me keep my slow, gentle pace for long, bucking her hips and whimpering beneath me.

I obliged gladly, moving in and out of her fast.

We were soon fucking at such a pace that neither of us could quite catch our breaths and sweat covered our bodies in a thin sheen and we were a mess of everything that we had felt for the last few months of our marriage.

More than that, really.

Everything from the last five years of our lives.

Clare moaned louder and longer with the moments that passed, her eyes closing and her head falling to the side.

I kissed her neck, every so often biting, remembering how crazy it used to make her.

She gasped and wrapped her legs around my waist, a feeling I loved.

She dragged her nails up my back, making me shiver.

Her fingers found the nape of my neck and soon tangled themselves into my hair and pulled hard.

It was her turn to remember something that drove me crazy.

I groaned as I only moved more violently inside of her.

After what felt like an eternity of teasing and arousing and being one with each other, I felt her tighten around me.

"E-Eli!" she gasped between long, sexy moans.

"Oh, Clare," I breathed, loving the feeling of her coming around me.

She shook beneath me as she finally let herself release.

I had been close for the past few minutes, only waiting for her to let myself go.

We came together, a feeling that was unmatched by any other.

Panting and sweating and moaning softly, we held each other for the long moments that followed.

In a daze, we drifted slowly in and out of sleep, only being pulled to full consciousness by the sound of the phone ringing.

Clare got up and I admired her perfect form as she found the phone.

Rather than answering, she unplugged it to silence it.

A smirk was on her lips as she turned back to me.

She found her purse and turned her phone off, then found my pants and did the same to mine.

I raised a brow at her and she bit her lip playfully.

She knelt beside me, stroking my hair and pulling it every so often.

"I was thinking we could move this upstairs… We wouldn't want a day in bed to be interrupted by people we don't want to talk to," she purred, pouting lightly at me.

I growled in my throat, pulling her to a standing position as I got up.

I captured her lips in a hungry kiss, grabbing the backs of her legs and picking her up.

She wrapped her arms and legs around me tightly and we kissed with as much passion as we could muster as we disappeared up the stairs, not to be heard from until late the next morning.

_I went from sad to a little bit happier in one chapter because I don't like depressing you all completely. Can't wait to see what the doctor has to say, ehh? Well please please let me know what you think, I get much more motivated to update when I have lots of lovely reviews!_


	8. Chapter 8

_The declining amount of reviews makes me sad, I hope people aren't losing interest because it kind of feels that way. But thanks to the loyal reviewers, you know who you are (: If you care to, let me know what you think and review! By the way, I've been super excited to write this one for quite a while… You'll see why!_

That day we spent together really helped our relationship.

In the days following, we found that we had regained our spontaneity.

Even though our future was uncertain, we knew that above all we had each other and we would overcome our obstacles together.

On Sunday evening, after a week full of stolen time making love and enjoying the pure happiness we had been deprived of the months prior, we found ourselves lying in bed together, bodies shimmering with the sweat of the event that took place just moments ago.

Clare's head and arm rested on my chest, her legs wrapped snugly around mine.

I could tell she was sleepy by the way her breathing evened out.

When I lifted her face to mine, she looked at me through half-lidded eyes.

"I never thought I'd be so in love again. First after Julia, then after I left… Yet you always prove me wrong. Every time."

She smiled gleefully. "That's what I'm here for. To prove you wrong," she teased.

I laughed before tilting her chin and placing a series of small kisses on her lips.

"But really, you don't have to give me the credit," she soon added, burying her face in my neck. "Because I felt the same way. Not necessarily at the beginning of our relationship, because I'd never truly loved before. But you did show me a love I didn't know was possible. And you reintroduced me when we found each other again."

"Basically we're just really fucking perfect for each other."

"Exactly," she giggled.

Tomorrow marked the one-week point after our doctor's visit.

We had an appointment to go in to find out the results. We would know for sure if something was wrong.

"Clare, baby," I started, causing her to look up at me. "I just want you to know, whatever happens with the results from the doctor… Well we'll be able to get through it. We can get through anything."

She smiled softly, and I saw a tear glistening in the corner of her eye.

She nodded, biting her lip. "I know," she said softly, "I'm so lucky I have someone as wonderful as you."

"You're the wonderful one," I murmured, pulling her back to my body and rubbing small circles on her back.

Soon her body had fallen heavy and her breathing had evened out once more, and I knew she was asleep.

I held her close and I too drifted off to sleep, neither of us waking until the next morning.

We went into the doctor's office and were in much sooner than last time.

"Well, Mr. and Mrs. Goldsworthy, none of the lab results or x-rays revealed anything to be wrong with either one of you."

We shot each other looks of surprise, thinking for sure something was wrong.

"This is normal," she began, noticing our looks of shock. "Conception can, in some cases, take a long time. Just keep trying, and it should eventually work out for you. If you are still having problems in a few months, there are fertility treatments we can discuss."

"Th-Thank you so much," Clare said with a relieved sigh.

"You're welcome," the doctor said with a warm smile. "Now I am going to have the nurse take blood tests from each of you, just to make sure there is nothing we missed although the chance of that is extremely low. These tests don't take as long to process and we'll have the results back to you in a few days."

"Will we have to come in for another visit?" I asked, knowing I was starting to push it with how much I'd had to take off of work.

"Oh, no. I'll just call you. I have your home phone as well as each of your cellular and work phones in my records, correct?"

We both nodded. "Yes ma'am," I said with a polite smile.

She led us into a small room where we waited for the nurse.

When she showed up, she didn't say much, only instructed us on how to situate our arms and collected the blood samples.

We left and after a long hug and plenty of kisses of relief, we went our separate ways to work.

That day went by slower than I thought imaginable. I found myself already checking my phone obsessively.

There was a miniscule chance they had missed something, but that small chance still made me worry.

I hadn't exactly been responsible in my lifestyle choices the years previous, and I knew it was very likely that something would be wrong with me.

It was too good to be true that we were both perfectly fine, yet hadn't conceived yet.

The next day was exactly the same, full of the agony of waiting.

I got home to find Clare laying food out on the table.

She smiled warmly at me and wrapped her arms around my waist.

"I hope pasta is okay, it's all we had. I've been too stressed to even think of groceries," she admitted, laughing softly.

"Pasta sounds amazing," I said before kissing the top of her head softly.

We sat at the table and ate, talking animatedly and enthusiastically throughout.

"So how was your day at work?" she asked me before taking another bite.

"To be honest, it was really long. I know the doctor said that it wasn't likely for anything to be wrong, but I still can't stand the wait."

"I know," she agreed, nodding. "It's been the same for me. I check my phone every fifteen minutes like a crazy person."

I laughed. "Me too. You're not alone."

Our conversation left the stress of waiting and we talked lightheartedly for the rest of the night.

After the food was gone and the table was cleared, we walked upstairs together and changed. Clare wore my t-shirt, which I loved on her, and I stripped down to my boxers.

We relaxed into the bed and turned on the TV.

We soon found ourselves kissing passionately, arms and legs a tangled mess within one another.

I shifted my position so that I went from being on top of Clare to being under her, pulling her light body on top of me.

Our remaining clothing was soon discarded and she pulled me back on top of her, both of us breathing heavily.

As I kissed her, she grinded her hips into mine.

I knew she was anxious, but sometimes I really just wanted to savor everything about her. I didn't want to rush.

My hands held her hips down as my lips continued to move on hers.

I pressed my body against hers and loved the familiar feeling of her.

Finally, I spread her legs apart and was met with an overwhelming sense of pleasure as I pushed myself inside.

She whimpered as I moved in and out at a teasingly slow pace.

I didn't pick up much speed, but as I pushed myself inside of her I probed deeper each time.

As I repeated my slow, deep movements, she moaned and her hands became tangled in my hair.

She slowly rocked her hips with mine, and we were in perfect harmony.

We were one. I couldn't tell where I ended and she began.

Our lips remained locked in a kiss for the ages.

The lingering pace made it much easier for us to last longer and enjoy each other completely.

"I love how you make love to me," Clare whispered breathlessly against my lips, the huskiness in her voice driving me crazy.

I responded by picking up the pace, only a little, just enough for both of us to enjoy a higher intensity of the feelings we gave each other.

I could have stayed there in that moment making love to the woman I loved forever, and it quite felt like it was turning out to be forever.

It was perfection in its truest form.

All concept of time was lost. It was only us.

I pushed myself into her a little harder, and I knew I'd hit her spot when she moaned loud in pleasure.

I repeated the movement, drawing another moan.

Continuing to move the same way, I found a steady pace and the sounds pouring out of her made me crazy.

I watched her as her eyes closed tight and her chest rose and fell with every heavy breath.

She cried my name and took my hair tightly in her hands, and every inch of my body was filled with pleasure.

Her moans became quicker and louder and I felt myself coming close.

She soon tightened around me and I couldn't hold back anymore.

We came together, each calling out for the other as we trembled in each other's arms.

It wasn't until I relaxed into the bed beside her that I realized how tired I was.

"Holy shit," she breathed, her eyes closed. She hadn't moved from her position on her back.

I chuckled at her cursing, still finding it adorable and out of character for her. "You've got that right."

"How long did that last?" she asked, opening her eyes and tilting her head towards me.

I looked up at the clock and was shocked when it read eleven p.m.

"Well what time would you say it started?"

"Probably around nine," she said softly. "Why, what time is it?"

I laughed quietly and returned to my position beside her. "Eleven."

She raised her brows, "No way."

She sat up and laughed when she saw the clock.

"Time flies," I said with a smirk as I pulled her close.

Both of us exhausted, we quickly fell into deep sleep.

The next morning, we each went to work and the waiting game began all over again.

The phone at work suddenly pulled me out of my worried daze and I answered it.

"Hello, is there a Mr. Eli Goldsworthy there?" the voice at the other end asked.

"This is he," I said. "How can I help you?"

"Hello, sir. This is Jan from Dr. Wilson's office. I was calling to tell you the results of the blood tests."

"There's nothing bad, is there? Have you called Clare, does she know?"

Worry overwhelmed me.

"No, sir, we couldn't get a hold of her." I remembered suddenly she had a meeting today. "And there is no bad news. Quite the opposite actually. The results from Mrs. Goldsworthy's blood tests actually reveal her to be pregnant. Congratulations, sir."

My jaw dropped. The phone nearly fell out of my hand. I was speechless.

"Sir, are you there?" she asked after several moments of my silence.

"Oh, yes ma'am, I'm sorry. Thank you so much!"

"You're welcome, Mr. Goldsworthy. Would you like to schedule an appointment to see Dr. Wilson? We recommend this of all expectant parents. We'll check to see how far along the pregnancy is and we'll give Mrs. Goldsworthy her first ultrasound."

I scheduled the appointment and hoped it would work for Clare before thanking the lady profusely and hanging up.

The owner of the store was in an office in the back room, and I ran hurriedly back there.

"Hey, Scott," I said breathlessly after walking into his office.

"Hey, Eli. What's up?"

"I was wondering if I could take the rest of the day off. I know I've been taking a lot of time off lately, but I just got a phone call. Clare's pregnant!"

He smiled up at me, "Congratulations, man. Yeah, it's no big deal, I'll have someone come in for you. Go be with your wife."

I thanked him before running out the door and driving Morty to Clare's office.

Getting off of work had been easy for me, but I knew these people were probably not so cool with Clare.

There would have to be a good excuse for her to leave on such short notice.

I walked in and found the reception desk.

"Hello, how can I help you?" the lady behind the desk asked in monotone.

"Hi, I was needing to pick up my wife Clare Goldsworthy for the rest of the day. There's an… emergency."

"We don't let our employees off on such short notice. Unless there's a valid reason for this situation to not have been dealt with ahead of time-"

"My dad died," I blurted. I felt like this lady wouldn't settle for pregnancy, and it was the first thing that came to my mind.

"Oh, I'm so sorry sir. Let me call the office." She picked up the phone and dialed an extension. "Yes, hello. Clare Goldsworthy's husband is here, he's informed me that his father has passed away and needs Mrs. Goldsworthy instantly. Yes, thank you."

She hung up the phone and informed me they would send Clare down shortly.

A few minutes later, Clare met me in the lobby and it took everything I had not to smile and hold her and tell her right then and there.

"What's going on Eli?" she asked, confused.

"Just come with me, I'll explain outside," I whispered, pulling her with me.

When we were outside and out of earshot, I squeezed her hand and smiled down at her.

"I didn't want to scare you by making up a random excuse, and I knew you wouldn't worry with that one."

"That makes sense. But what's going on?" She looked at me hesitantly.

Suddenly, a thought occurred to me.

"I have a surprise for you."

We got into Morty and I pulled out of the parking lot, not telling her where we were going.

"Eli, what's going on? You're worrying me."

"Come on, Clare," I said, grinning madly at her, "Where's your sense of adventure?"

She sighed, defeated, and just rode with me in silence.

I pulled up to a very familiar park, the same park we used to frequent when we were younger.

"This is the surprise?" she asked, raising a brow in confusion.

"'Oh, Eli, how sweet and romantic of you. Thank you so much for stealing me from that horrible workplace and surprising me with your spontaneity and charm!'"

My voice was sarcastic as I mimicked her, as I used to do so often when her reactions were the opposite of what I wanted.

She smirked at me. "Okay, okay. You win."

I leaned across to her and kissed her gently before getting out of the car and grabbing a blanket from the back.

She too got out as I set the blanket on the grass and immediately lay down on it.

She joined me and I took her in my arms, holding her carefully and lovingly.

I kissed her, my lips hardly touching hers.

"Why so gentle?" she asked with a small smile.

"You're just very… delicate," I answered, placing my hand on her small, flat stomach and smiling widely at her.

The more I looked at her the more I couldn't stop smiling.

The love of my life was carrying my child.

I was the happiest man in the world.

My smile never faded as we looked into each other's eyes.

"What? You're making me nervous…"

Her eyes were wary as she looked at me.

"I love you, baby," I said suddenly.

"I love you too," she said hesitantly.

"What?" I asked with a raised brow, "Oh, sorry, Clare, I wasn't talking to you."

"Well who were you talking to? Eli, what's going on?"

I rubbed her stomach gently, grinning ear to ear.

She looked down at my hand and realized what I was implying.

Her eyes were wide.

"You're shitting me," she said, sitting up and looking from my hand on her stomach to me, and back again. "Eli, don't do this to me, you can't be serious."

"The doctor's office called me today. They told me your blood tests said you were pregnant. Congratulations, sweetheart."

Tears immediately formed in her eyes and she threw her arms around me, both of us falling to the ground once more.

"I can't believe it," she whispered, her eyes locked on mine. "We're going to have a baby!"

"We're going to have a baby," I repeated, feeling tears of my own form in my eyes.

_Yay! It feels good to finally have that written. Thoughts? (:_


	9. Chapter 9

_I'm so so sorry for the delay. Finals week killed me and I pretty much just didn't exist. So after recuperating yesterday, I'm back today! I was pleasantly surprised when only a few hours after publishing that last chapter I saw that I was left a lot of reviews! I seriously smiled really big (: So thank you all for encouraging me! From here on out it's about the journey, so it will follow them pretty closely. I'll try not to have major skips or anything (: Enjoy and let me know what you think lovelies!_

I woke up late Sunday morning to the feeling of Eli's body pressed behind mine, his arms around me securely.

I sighed, content.

All was perfect in my world.

I had the marriage I'd always dreamed of with the man I couldn't see myself without, and we were expecting a baby.

Things couldn't have been better.

I pressed my body closer to Eli's and smiled at the feeling of skin on skin, no clothes to separate us.

He groaned and shifted in his sleep, his face buried in my hair.

I played with his fingers as he breathed evenly behind me. As our fingers intertwined, I thought of our future together.

I imagined what life with our baby would be like. Whether it would be a boy or a girl, whether it would have auburn hair like me or dark hair like Eli's. Green eyes or blue eyes.

Whatever it would be like, I knew I would love it unconditionally. I already did.

Eli's hand moved from mine and found my stomach.

I turned my head and our eyes met.

He still looked dazed with sleep, but a smile adorned his lips.

"Morning," he murmured, pressing a kiss to my forehead.

"Morning," I said with a small giggle.

He pulled me over on my back and leaned over me, his eyes falling from my face to my stomach where his hand rested.

He smiled a small smile before leaning down and kissing my bare skin softly.

He lay down next to me and pulled me to him in a tight embrace.

"Do you think about the baby a lot?" I asked quietly as I rested my cheek against his chest. We hadn't even known about the baby for a week, but it was constantly on my mind.

"Always," he murmured. "You have no idea."

"Oh, I'm sure I do," I giggled.

He laughed softly and gave me a squeeze.

"So do you want a boy or a girl?" I asked, leaning back to look at him eye to eye.

I smiled mischievously as he appeared to be deep in thought. I was sure he wanted to answer carefully as to not offend me.

"Well, I'll love it just as much either way…"

"But if you could choose. Come on, Eli. It's just for fun."

"Well, not to sound like a stereotypical guy, but of course I'd want a son. Not that I wouldn't want a daughter," he quickly added, making me giggle. "What about you?"

"Well, not to sound like a stereotypical woman, but I've always wanted a baby girl. It probably has something to do with having a sister. I don't know, its just something I've always imagined."

"Well it looks like we are at odds here," he said teasingly. I was about to speak up when he silenced me with his index finger. "I know that you'd love a boy, just like I'd love a girl. I was only joking, baby."

I laughed softly and once again rested my face against his chest.

"The doctor's appointment is tomorrow, isn't it?" he asked.

"Yeah. I got a time during my lunch break so I'll only have to miss a little bit of work if the time runs long. Are you going to be able to come?" I didn't want to have to go alone.

"Of course. Scott's really cool with all of this. I'll probably stay an hour late and close to make up the time, but I'll be able to go."

"Good," I whispered and hugged him tighter.

Our embrace was interrupted by the sound of the phone ringing. He groaned as I reached over to my nightstand and took the phone off of the hook.

"Hello?" I asked, sitting up.

"Clare, hey, can I talk to Eli?"

"Why hello, Adam! I'm doing wonderfully, thanks for asking. How are you on this fine day?" I raised my brow and smirked, though he couldn't see.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "Hi, Clare, how are you?"

"I'm fine," I said with a soft laugh. "Here he is."

I handed the phone to a smirking Eli before getting up and walking over to the dresser.

I paid no attention to what Eli was saying as I pulled on plain black underwear and a matching cotton tank top.

I walked across the room to the bathroom. Eli covered the phone with his hand and looked at me.

"Hey, Clare, can I go with Adam to pick up his new car?"

I looked at him and smiled. "You're asking my permission?"

"Well… yeah? I don't know, I just thought…"

"It's fine if you go, Eli. Ask him if Fiona is doing anything today."

He held the phone back to his ear.

"No I didn't ask her if I could go," he said defensively. I laughed as I ran my fingers through my curls.

I began to brush my teeth as a still naked Eli joined me in the bathroom.

"She's at her mom's with Hugo for brunch right now, but he doesn't think she has any plans for later."

I nodded before rinsing and setting the toothbrush back in the holder.

I turned around and couldn't help but lower my gaze as he stepped closer.

"Have I ever told you how sexy you look in black?" he asked in a low voice, pulling my gaze back up to rest on his smirk.

His darkened eyes bore into me.

I bit my lip as he pushed me back against the counter.

He lifted me up onto the flat surface beside the sink and positioned himself between my legs.

He leaned down and pushed my hair aside to place long kisses against my neck.

"A-aren't you supposed to be going with Adam?" I breathed, tilting my head back to give him more room.

"Not for another hour," he mumbled against my skin, his breath hot.

I shuttered slightly as his hands gripped my waist.

His right hand toyed with the waistband of my panties and slowly slipped behind them.

I moaned as his fingers massaged me and his lips continued to work my neck.

And suddenly, he was gone.

My eyes opened as I sighed from the loss and I saw him getting into the shower, turning it on and closing the curtain.

I sat still for a moment, in a bit of a shock.

After I realized he wasn't coming out any time soon, I got off of he counter and undressed before stepping into the steaming shower.

"It's about time," he said from where he stood in front of me, suds covering his hair.

I smirked and pushed him back under the water. It rinsed the shampoo from his hair as our lips met in a hot, hungry kiss.

He groaned as he turned us around, pushing me under the steaming water.

As I pulled him closer, the feeling against my leg told me he was already hard.

I smirked into the kiss, which was short lived as he suddenly turned me around and pushed me against the wall under the shower head.

I caught myself by pressing my hands to the cool tile of the wall.

He held my hips and pressed himself against me, teasing me.

I moaned as he pushed himself into my wet core. He only pushed himself in a little before pulling out.

I whimpered at the loss of him.

He pushed himself again, only a little further, before pulling back out.

"God damnit, Eli," I whined. His grip on my hips became tighter, and he finally pushed himself all the way in.

He moved in and out and I couldn't hold back a moan.

The hot water falling on my back only made me crazier.

He moved fiercely in and out and I could tell he was just as lost in the moment as I was.

He growled as my hands pressed harder against the tile and I called out his name.

I turned my head and bit my lip at the sight of his hair stuck to his face, water running down his cheeks, his nose, his shoulders, his chest, trailing all the way down to where our bodies met.

He looked at me darkly and moved faster.

My eyes closed tightly and my breathing became heavy.

I pushed myself back against him, his cock going deeper than before.

"Clare," he groaned, his fingers digging into my skin.

I moaned out at the feeling, resting my dizzy head against my extended arm.

I heard a moan of his own sound as his thrusting became quicker and quicker.

"Oh, Eli," I breathed. "Oh, yes…"

He moved one of his hands from my waist and reached in front of me to turn the water up even hotter. It was nearly scalding as it hit my bare skin.

I moaned loudly at the feeling, along with his sharp thrusts inside of me.

"Clare," he moaned out. "Oh… baby…"

"God, Eli!" I nearly yelled as he moved more recklessly, hitting that spot in me hard.

My moans became yells as he continued the movements.

He groaned loudly and by the grip he had on my body, I knew he was almost there.

"E-Eli," I called out, my voice loud and shaking.

With a few more hard thrusts he sent me over the edge and my hands were white as they pressed against the wall, my eyes closed tightly and moans pouring from my lips.

After I rode out my orgasm, his thrusts became lazy.

He was panting as he finally pulled out of me.

He pulled me up and held me from behind, the water pouring over us.

I slowly turned around and leaned up to kiss him.

I felt him smile against my lips.

"What?" I whispered, pulling back a few inches.

"I just love you," he murmured, pushing my wet hair out of my face.

"I love you too," I said before kissing him again.

As soon as we got out of the shower it was nearly time for him to go.

We got ready together before he finally left, kissing me goodbye before he went.

I smiled as I went upstairs to call Fiona, unable to hide my complete happiness.

_It's late and I can't form complete thoughts. But I'll continue this tomorrow, you deserve lots of updates : ) Continue with the lovely feedback!_


	10. Chapter 10

_This chapter took for fucking ever to write for some reason. I'm sorry it's later than I promised ): Leave me some pretty little reviews and I'll try to get another update up soon! I'd love suggestions for anything you'd like to see throughout the pregnancy… I don't want it to get dry and there's a lot of space to fill!_

I finished getting ready after Eli left to get Adam, and picked up the phone by the bed.

I dialed Fiona's number and waited as it rang several times.

"Hello?" she finally answered breathlessly.

"Hey, Fiona, it's Clare. Did I catch you at a bad time?"

"No, I just walked in the door and heard the phone ringing. What's up?"

"Well I was just wondering if you wanted company, or help with Hugo, or anything like that. Eli's with Adam so…"

"Yeah, that boy is so excited for his new car. Come on over, Clare, I really could use the company. I'm still recuperating from brunch with my mom."

I laughed and told her I'd be over soon.

When I arrived at the huge home, I was greeted at the door by Fiona holding a giggling Hugo.

He was absolutely perfect. I couldn't believe I had a child of my own growing inside of me at that very moment.

I greeted my friend with a hug and offered to hold Hugo. She handed him over eagerly, and he looked up at me with wide eyes.

I made a face at him and he giggled the most adorable little laugh I'd ever heard.

I ruffled the tuft of blonde hair on top of his head and he giggled once again.

"I can't get over how much he loves you. Eli too. He's usually shy around strangers," Fiona said from where she stood across the foyer browsing through a pile of mail and sorting it into piles.

"He's such an angel," I said as I looked at his smiling face.

"Uh oh. Looks like someone has baby fever," she teased, and I laughed softly with no answer.

We hadn't told anyone we were pregnant yet, not even our closest friends. It was still so early and we didn't want to share the news in case anything went wrong.

"What do you say to a movie and some coffee?" she asked with a raised brow.

"That sounds great." I realized that I shouldn't have caffeine. "But no coffee, thanks," I said reluctantly. It was going to be a rough nine months with no coffee.

"Okay, well I'm going to make some, go into the living room and pick a movie?"

I looked through the movies and saw the collection, half action half chick-flicks. There was no middle ground.

I smiled as I looked through the chick-flicks, which I knew were Fiona's preference.

I found one that looked like it would be the least painful to sit through and put it in, letting it sit on the title menu until Fiona returned.

Hugo was babbling as I held him in my arms. I lightly poked his nose, causing him to scrunch up his face and giggle. I laughed too and did it again.

"Oh, good choice!" Fiona said as she entered the room.

"Glad you think so," I said, turning and smiling at her. She joined me at the couch, sighing as she sat down.

"Looks like someone's happy," she cooed as Hugo sat in my lap smiling.

"He's such a perfect baby," I said smiling down at him.

"Yes he is," she said smiling. "You would be a really great mom, Clare."

I grinned at her. "You think so?"

"Oh, I know so. You're the most caring person I've ever met. Very nurturing."

"Well thanks," I said, still smiling.

She took the remote and pushed play, and within the next half hour, the baby was asleep in my arms soundly.

The rest of the afternoon Fiona and I talked and enjoyed each other's company.

We heard a loud engine that was unmistakably Eli's hearse. When it was silenced, there was a much softer purring engine that was still on.

We walked to the door, Fiona walking outside to admire the new cherry red sports car while I remained in the doorway.

Eli grinned as he joined me. He looked down at Hugo and smiled even bigger.

We shared a look and he kissed me before the other couple rejoined us.

We stayed for dinner but returned home soon after, wanting plenty of rest.

As we stood side by side in the bathroom getting ready for bed, I couldn't help but be tense.

"What if something is wrong tomorrow?" I asked for the millionth time.

"The baby will be fine. I promise," Eli said softly, looking at me in the mirror.

"I know… I can't help it."

"I know. I worry too, sweetie, but it's pointless. No need to worry if nothing's wrong, okay?" He turned to me and took my hands in his. I turned my body to his as well and was calmed when I looked into the emerald eyes staring back at me.

That night, Eli held me and kissed me until I fell into a peaceful sleep.

…

"So, Mr. Goldsworthy, we don't think it's anything to worry Mrs. Goldsworthy about, we just wanted to let you know that the heartbeat we read was a little fast for this point in the pregnancy."

The ultrasound tech had pulled me aside to tell me the news I was not so happy to hear.

Clare was exactly six weeks into the pregnancy and everything seemed absolutely perfect except for the heartbeat.

The woman assured me that it was nothing to worry about yet, but I wasn't so easy to trust.

We rejoined my wife, now fully dressed and all smiles.

After thanking the tech and setting an appointment for the next week, we left and I drove her back to work.

"You've been quiet this whole car ride. Is something wrong?" she asked, turning to me and placing her hand gently over mine.

"No," I answered quickly. "No, I'm fine. I'll see you tonight? I'll probably be a little late."

"Okay," she said with a smile. She leaned in and kissed me quickly before exiting the car and heading inside.

Everything until this point had been so perfect. I just hoped this wasn't the beginning of something horrible.

…

When I got back to work, I was restless.

The ringing phone was not pressing in my mind. Neither were the stack of papers sitting in the corner of my desk, nor were the emails backed up in my inbox.

All I could think of was my baby and how perfect he or she would be.

I finally answered the phone and talked halfheartedly to a client.

When I hung up, my supervisor was standing over my desk and staring at me skeptically.

"You should be more enthusiastic, Ms. Edwards."

"Goldsworthy," I quietly corrected.

"Whatever," she snapped. "Just do your job right."

Normally her bitchiness would have put me on edge, made me livid. But not today. Nothing could get me down.

I was only half there for the rest of the work day, but when five o'clock rolled around, I was the first to be out the door.

When I got home, my heart sank a bit when I realized Eli wouldn't be home for another two or three hours.

I sat on the couch in the living room and mindlessly flipped through the channels on TV. I pulled my phone from where my purse sat on the coffee table.

I went through my contacts and my eyes rested on _Mom._

There had been so much tension ever since that night we had all gone out together.

I wanted nothing more than to put it all behind us. I wanted a good relationship with my mom.

I swallowed a lump in my throat and pressed the call button.

It rang several times before she answered. "Hello?" she asked tersely.

She was so stubborn it was sickening.

"Hi, mom," I said quietly.

"Hello, Clare," she answered.

"I was just wondering how you were doing," I went on after she fell silent.

"I'm fine. How are you? Are you having problems at home?"

"What makes you say that?" I asked suddenly, confused.

"I just figured it was only a matter of time before that boy…"

"_That boy_ is my husband," I interrupted her. "And things at home are absolutely wonderful, just so you know."

"Don't get short with me, Clare. I just think that things are going to turn around and hurt you in the end."

I laughed darkly. "You know, I was hoping for a mature conversation with my mother. Looks like you haven't come around yet. Call me when you grow up."

I hung up as I felt tears sting my eyes. She was my mom. I still needed her.

As I looked back down at my phone, I called someone I knew I could still rely on.

"Hi… Dad, it's me." I was choking back tears I felt coming.

"Clare, honey what's wrong?"

"I just talked to mom…"

"Say no more," he said, disappointment in his voice. "Do you want to meet at the Dot and get a cup of coffee?"

"That sounds good," I said softly. We agreed to meet in ten minutes.

I hung up and drove over to the small café.

"Hi, Clare honey," I heard from behind me. My dad came around and sat across from me.

I felt at ease in his presence. Like he still protected me.

I told him about how the conversation with my mom went, and he was just as frustrated with her as I was.

He assured me that Eli was a good man, which I already knew, and that our future together looked bright, which I also knew. But it was good to hear, all the same.

As he drank his coffee, he looked at my water curiously.

"My Clare, coffee fiend, drinking water on this cold night?" he asked with a raised brow.

I wanted so badly to tell him about the pregnancy. The doctor had said that everything was fine, so there didn't seem to be a chance for anything to go wrong.

"I… can't have caffeine for a while."

I bit my lip and looked down, my heart pounding.

"A while? How long is a while?"

"About… 9 months." I looked up at him and couldn't help but smile.

"No. You have to be joking. You're not serious." He broke out into a grin when I just shook my head. "My baby is having a baby. Congratulations Clare-bear."

"Thanks, dad," I said with a grin. "But speaking of having a baby… Any news on Darcy coming back?"

"No," he said shaking his head, "But I hope it's soon. Kenya doesn't seem like the safest place to have a baby. That would be so good for you girls to be together at this time in your lives."

"Yeah, I was sort of thinking the same thing…"

I missed my sister a lot, and hardly ever got to talk to her. But I knew she was wise to stay far away from the drama that Toronto brought.

As he was quizzing me on how far along I was and what the doctors were saying, my phone rang. When I pulled it out, I saw Eli's name on the caller ID.

"Clare, are you okay? Where are you?" He hadn't even given me a chance to say hello.

"Eli, I'm fine. I'm sorry, I must have lost track of time. I'm at the Dot with my dad. What time is it anyway?"

He told me it was nearly ten o'clock and I was shocked. I told him I'd be home soon and placed my phone back in my purse.

"We should do this more often," my dad said as he pulled me into a hug. I agreed as I hugged him back.

We bid each other good night and went our separate ways.

When I got home, Eli was waiting on the couch watching Fight Club.

"Ah the memories," I said with a small giggle as I sat down beside him.

"First date memories, in particular," he said, looking over at me and smirking.

I laughed to myself as I thought of my stupid rebellious phase.

"Do you still have your piercing?" he asked.

"Of course," I said softly, pushing back my hair to reveal my pierced upper ear. "What about you?"

He pushed back his hair and I grinned when I saw the silver earring that matched mine.

_Sorry for the brief change in POV. I thought it worked though. And I know I tend to overuse Fight Club, but I fucking love the book and movie alike, and it is in character for these two, so I can get away with it (: Again, thoughts and suggestions are GREATLY appreciated!_


	11. Chapter 11

_Hello lovelies! I'm baaaaack (: I expect everyone to now hate me… I'm so so so sorry for the abandonment! There was an issue with my computer, and with losing all of the prewritten chapters I had. I subsequently freaked the fuck out, then stubbornness ensued. Then I got sad without writing anything, so I finally mustered up the strength and freed up the time to do some writing! Since I lost everything I won't be able to update as often as before, but multiple months won't pass between updates, I promise! And I didn't pick up where I left off on the last update because I completely forgot where I was going with that... And I wanted to move on! Okay, rant over. Reviews, pretty please?(:_

Clare was almost ten weeks along and I still didn't know what was wrong with our baby.

Every time we went in for an appointment, I was too fucking scared to say anything.

I would freeze up and just sit there silently the whole time.

It was enough to nearly drive me crazy.

After a month of waiting, I was finally determined to ask what was up at the next appointment.

Whatever it was, one thing I knew for sure was that I was going to be there for Clare through it all.

On my lunch break and I pulled out my phone to call her. She had become more insistent on my calling her multiple times throughout the day to ensure her that everything was fine and to tell her I love her.

The pregnancy hormones had definitely kicked in. I have never seen my strong and independent Clare on such an emotional roller coaster.

"Hello?" I heard her voice as she answered. She sounded upset.

"Hi, sweetie," I said, my voice cheerful in an attempt to lighten the mood

"What's up? Did you need something?"

She seemed irritable. I couldn't really take it personally. Even if it was me that she was upset with, she would get over it soon enough.

"I just wanted to tell you I love you, baby," I answered softly, carefully.

"I love you too," she sighed.

"Are you okay?" I asked. I knew I was probably opening up a lengthy rant on her end, but anything to make her feel better.

"No," she answered simply.

"Want to talk about it?" I prodded.

"Not particularly. But if you must know, I'm upset because you didn't call me earlier. I was worried sick all day. You really should be more considerate to how I feel, Eli. You can't just not call when I'm expecting you to call."

"I'm sorry, Clare. I really am. There was a new album released today and we've been slammed. I would have called if I could have, I promise baby."

I heard her sniffle on the other end. It broke my heart to see her so upset, even if I knew it would shortly be over.

"Please don't be upset, Clare," I pleaded gently. "I'll make it up to you tonight with a massage and some reading."

"Really?" she asked in a small voice.

"Of course." I had begun to read to her at night. It seemed to calm her down after her long days and it helped her sleep. She also liked the idea of our baby hearing my voice consistently.

"I'd love that. You're the greatest husband imaginable, Eli. I have no right to complain about anything you do, anything at all. I'm sorry."

"Clare, don't be sorry. Really, please don't. Just try to cheer up, for me."

"I will," she said, and I could hear a smile in her voice. "Eli?"

"Yeah?" I asked, happy to know she was in better spirits already.

"I'm so happy we're having this baby together. I can't wait to start our family together."

"I'm happy too, baby. The happiest man alive."

"Do you promise?"

"I swear."

It was true that the idea of having a family with the woman I loved made me happy, but the thought that there was something wrong with our child was the most depressing thought that could ever have crossed my mind.

I couldn't think about it. I couldn't let myself think those thoughts.

"I should probably get going. It's getting crazy out there again. I love you."

"I love you too," she answered softly. "Bye, Eli."

"Bye, Clare."

We hung up and I made my way back out to the store for the rest of a long shift.

…

My heart jumped when I heard the door open and close. I had been waiting for Eli for hours since I'd come home.

When he appeared in the doorway of our bedroom I couldn't help but smile.

He kicked off his shoes and pulled off his pants before crawling into bed with me.

"Hey baby," he murmured as he pulled me close. I smiled as I rested my head against his chest.

"Hey," I whispered back. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too."

We sat there like that for a long while, just embracing and enjoying one another.

He finally pulled back and smiled at me. "Ready for that massage?"

"Of course," I said with a large grin.

I knelt up to crawl in front of him but had to stop for a minute. A sudden wave of nausea came over me.

"Are you alright?" he asked quickly, rubbing my back. He was always so concerned when the slightest thing went wrong, almost as if it were life or death.

"I'm fine," I said, giving him a weak smile. "Just felt a little sick. I'm better now."

I sat in front of him and my eyes fluttered shut as his fingers began to work at my shoulders. They moved further and further down my back, relaxing me more and more at his every touch.

I was finally so relaxed and so tired I could hardly keep my eyes open.

He pulled me back so that I was lying on my back, my head in his lap.

He gently pressed his fingers to my temple and lightly massaged my head. I sighed at the feeling, letting my eyes fall closed and nearly falling asleep right then and there.

"You look tired," he said softly.

"Mhm," I answered lazily, eyes still closed.

"Well before you drift off do you want me to do some reading?" he asked as his fingers continued to massage my head.

"Yeah," I said with a smile. "I'd love it."

It always made me so happy when he read at night. It was a new thing we had started. My changing hormones made it hard to sleep at night because my mind usually went a hundred miles an hour.

Eli's voice was soothing and comforting.

"What are you going to read tonight?" I asked as I settled back into my side of the bed and he rose to walk to the bookcase in the corner of the room.

He hummed as he looked through the titles before finally selecting one.

"Alice in Wonderland?" he spoke as he turned back around, raising a brow.

"Sounds great," I said with a smile. He joined me and I cuddled close to him.

He leaned down to give me a soft, sweet kiss before he opened the book to the first page.

"Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank, and of having nothing to do: once or twice she had peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no pictures or conversations in it, 'and what is the use of a book,' thought Alice 'without pictures or conversation?'"

I rested my eyes and smiled as I listened.

I listened to the story he was reading with the exception of letting my mind wander to our baby.

Nothing made me happier than thinking of our family. I couldn't imagine being anything but happy about what was to come.

The past few weeks I had allowed myself to think of names.

I wondered if it would be a boy or a girl. Eli and I had decided to let it be a surprise and to wait until the baby was born to find out.

I reached over and began to run my hand up and down his arm. Being with Eli gave me such a good feeling. I knew we had made a good decision in staying married. It just felt right to be together.

"In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how in the world she was to get out again. The rabbit-hole went straight on like a tunnel for some way, and then dipped suddenly down, so suddenly that Alice had not a moment to think about stopping herself before she found herself falling down a very deep well."

Sleep was coming closer and closer already. I felt as if I would doze off any moment now.

My mind relaxed as I allowed myself to listen to Eli and to focus on relaxation and sleep.

Before I knew it, I was waking up to Eli's voice some while later.

"There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door, so she went back to the table, half hoping she might find another key on it, or at any rate a book of rules for shutting people up like telescopes: this time she found a little bottle on it, ('which certainly was not here before,' said Alice,) and round the neck of the bottle was a paper label, with the words 'DRINK ME' beautifully printed on it in large letters."

Try as I might, I couldn't keep myself conscious.

When I woke again, I had been sleeping a bit longer.

"Very soon the Rabbit noticed Alice, as she went hunting about, and called out to her in an angry tone, 'Why, Mary Ann, what are you doing out here? Run home this moment, and fetch me a pair of gloves and a fan! Quick, now!' And Alice was so much frightened that she ran off at once in the direction it pointed to, without trying to explain the mistake it had made."

I sighed as I repositioned myself. Eli stopped reading and looked down at me. I opened my eyes and looked up at him.

"Why did you stop?" I asked groggily.

He laughed softly. "Just to check on you. Sorry."

"It's alright. Don't let it happen again," I giggled.

"'He took me for his housemaid,' she said to herself as she ran. 'How surprised he'll be when he finds out who I am! But I'd better take him his fan and gloves—that is, if I can find them.' As she said this, she came upon a neat little house, on the door of which was a bright brass plate with the name 'W. RABBIT' engraved upon it. She went in without knocking, and hurried upstairs, in great fear lest she should meet the real Mary Ann, and be turned out of the house before she had found the fan and gloves."

After I fell asleep, I didn't wake up again until my alarm went off the next morning.

My alarm went off earlier than usual. We had a doctor's appointment.

I woke Eli up before getting up to get ready.

When I got out of the shower, I sat back on the bed to attempt once more to wake my still sleeping husband.

He groaned and pulled me down to him.

The sudden move made my stomach turn.

Our lips met as he kissed me. His kisses were sweet, but my still queasy stomach wasn't letting me enjoy them.

His hands began to roam my body, but all I could think of was the toilet I would soon be hugging.

He tried to pull me closer, but unable to take it anymore, I pulled myself away and ran into the bathroom just in time.

I felt bad. This had happened more and more lately. When I wasn't exhausted, I was sick.

In the last month, sex had been much less common than usual.

Eli said he didn't mind, but I knew it had to bother him.

After I finished evacuating the contents of my stomach, I brushed my teeth and walked back out into our bedroom. Eli was out of bed and dressed.

He walked over to me and pulled me against his body.

"You feeling okay?" he asked, placing his lips to my forehead.

"Better now, but not great," I mumbled as I let myself relax against him.

We finished getting ready with just enough time to spare.

Eli was jittery through the whole drive to the doctor's office, as well as during our wait.

I kept asking him if anything was wrong, but he would answer with very unpromising no's.

We finally got called back and the sonogram process was underway.

Rather than keeping my eyes focused on the screen as usual, I focused on Eli. He looked as if he were looking at a ghost.

I figured I was just reading too far into it. I was sure he wasn't upset. He would tell me if something was wrong, I know he would.

"Well," the doctor said, "Congratulations, your baby is-"

"No!" I said quickly, startling her. "I don't want to know. We want to be surprised."

We had told her that we didn't want to know the gender of our baby.

However, Eli shocked me by asking to have a word in private with the doctor.

I watched as they left the room. As I watched through the window, I saw a look of overwhelming happiness appear on his face and I knew he had asked.

How could he? After we had agreed on not knowing.

There would be no dealing with me after this appointment.

…

"Well," the doctor said, "Congratulations, your baby is-"

"No!" Clare nearly yelped, causing the doctor to jump a little. "I don't want to know. We want to be surprised."

The doctor looked a bit confused, but just shrugged. She knew better than to try to reason with Clare.

I looked at the baby on the screen. It looked bigger than other pictures I'd seen of sonograms, but I figured it just hadn't developed all the way yet.

Not only hadn't it developed all the way, but what parts were developing were doing so in the wrong way.

As I listened to the heartbeat, all I could think was that it was fast, really fast.

"Could I have a word outside?" I asked suddenly, standing and waiting expectantly.

"Of course," said the doctor as she stood and followed me.

Once we were safely outside, I was ready to know.

"So a while back when you were talking about the fast heartbeat-"

"That's actually what I was just going to explain in there before Clare stopped me. There's something you should know about your future family. By not wanting to know, Clare was talking about gender, I assume?"

"Yeah, she's determined not to find out," I said with a nod. "Now what do we need to know about our family?" She was making me so anxious by talking around the point.

"Well, the heartbeat we hear would be impossibly fast. For one baby."

"So there is something wrong with our baby?" I asked, going into a panic.

"No! No, there is nothing wrong. As I said, impossibly fast for _one _baby. Clare is carrying _two_ babies. Congratulations, Mr. Goldsworthy, you're having twins!"

Relief rushed over me at the knowledge that nothing was wrong.

Then the shock set in.

"T-twins?" I asked, stunned.

"That's right. You can tell Clare yourself, I don't think she'll listen to anything else I try to tell her," she laughed. She walked back into the room and cleaned Clare up.

I walked back in and smiled at Clare, looking from her to her growing belly.

But when our eyes met, she glared daggers at me.

Uh oh.


	12. Chapter 12

_Again, so sorry for the wait. After getting internet in the new apartment, I've found myself highly under-motivated. Degrassi has been so extremely disappointing recently. I don't know about you all, but I'm pretty much hating it. I don't know what it is. It's sad, but true. However, I do love my stories and my ideas for them, so I'm just trying to block what's going on with the show out of my head. I'll still be updating, but if anyone has suggestions for anything other than Degrassi (other TV shows, movies, books, etc.) that you would like me to write about,_ please _let me know. It doesn't even matter if it's not something I have listed on my profile, my loves are much broader than only what's listed there. I would love a change of pace so I don't keep getting sick of the same storylines. I love you all dearly and I am so sorry for making you wait so much! _

After our last sonogram, Clare hadn't spoken to me for days.

She was more pissed than I had ever seen her. When she did open her mouth to speak, all I got were one-word answers.

Immediately after we left I kept trying to tell her, but she wasn't having any of it. She was so insistent that I had found out the gender, having gone against her wishes.

Even when I pleaded with her and told her I never would have done such a thing, she just glared at me before looking away.

I've finally let it rest and have decided to tell her later.

The past week she's been much more civil, much to my relief.

"So I was thinking about Leonard for a boy," she said airily one afternoon as she came to join me on the couch.

I couldn't help the look of horror on my face.

"What, you don't like it?" she asked innocently.

"You _do_?" I asked. "That's a terrible name."

"Well it's sure as hell better than Edgar," she said pointedly.

"What, I was thinking of Poe," I said with a smirk.

"Well Leonard isn't at the top of my list. I just don't think you'd like the names I really like," she said shyly. I just shrugged.

"I don't like any of the names you suggest anyway, so why not give it a try?" I asked with a small laugh before kissing the top of her head.

"No, I don't think so," she said mysteriously.

I let it go and settled in against her.

…

It was always so awkward talking about names with Eli.

From the beginning of my pregnancy, I had thought it would be nice to name the baby after one of Eli's parents. Cecily for his mom, or Roger for his dad.

I just wasn't sure if it would be too painful for him, my even bringing it up. So I decided to keep quiet.

Later that night, I couldn't help myself from doing some household cleaning. When I finally decided to settle in for the night, I walked up to our bedroom and I stopped short at the door.

Eli looked so perfect sitting in bed reading, his hair kind of messy and the only clothes on his body being boxer shorts. I couldn't help but bite my lip and stare.

He seemed to have felt my presence and he looked up. "You okay?"

"Oh, yeah, of course," I said as I regained my composure and entered the room. I riffled around for some clothes to sleep in.

I began to undress, but before I could put my pajamas on I felt Eli's arms slide around my waist. His hands rested on my belly and he pulled me back to his body.

"You don't think I don't know what you were doing, do you?" he asked huskily in my ear. "I know you were checking me out."

I giggled and he turned me around. Our eyes met briefly before he connected our lips in a kiss. Lately my sex drive had skyrocketed.

I was still a little bitter about Eli's finding out our baby's gender and had been holding out on purpose, but I couldn't resist anymore.

I backed him into the bed and deepened the kiss. He laid back on the bed and I followed, straddling him and letting my hands roam.

He let out a little moan as my hands grazed his chest and it drove me crazy. I didn't hesitate in hooking my fingers into the waistband of his boxers and pulling them down.

He smirked against my lips and pulled my underwear down.

I wasted no time in taking advantage of the moment and I quickly mounted him and began to move quickly over him. He groaned and lightly nibbled my lower lip.

I moved faster and faster, feeling all of my pent up tension coming out.

"Jesus Christ, Clare," he breathed, closing his eyes tightly. His hands rested on my waist and moved with my body back and forth, back and forth.

"O-oh. Oh. Oh, Eli," I sighed. The quicker I moved my hips the better it felt. I could feel that I was already almost there.

"Clare," he repeated, bucking his hips a bit. It drove me crazy and I let out a loud, long moan. He continued the movement and I continued to move back and forth and before we knew it we were both trembling in each other's arms as we came together.

As I collapsed next to him, he brushed my hair from my face. "Sorry," he murmured. "I was a little quick there… It's just been so long…"

"Yeah, you're telling me," I breathed, smiling softly. "And no need to be sorry as long as we can do it again."

"Of course," he said with a grin. "But wait. I thought the idea of sex made you nauseous. What changed?"

"Well it did, but then about a week ago I got hornier than I've ever been in my life. I could hardly contain it."

"Then why did you?" he asked looking at me like I was crazy.

"I'm stubborn?" I asked before I laughed softly at his horror-stricken face. "I wanted to stay mad at you…"

"You're cruel, Clare Goldsworthy. Cruel and heartless."

"But you love me," I said as I brushed his cheek with my fingers.

Soon he had me pinned down on my back and the next hour was spent having the best sex of my life.

_Disclaimer: I have no idea what Bullfrog's actual name is. I apologize if it was ever mentioned and I wasn't observant enough to catch it, but Roger sounded good at the time of my writing this. Oh, and sorry it's short. I'm trying to get my ideas back in order. Again, suggest new ideas, pretty please!_


	13. Chapter 13

_Not to be repetitive, but really, what other stories would you all read if I wrote them? I don't want to keep getting burnt out and waiting a month or more between updates… which is sort of likely if I only have these stories. Pretty please? ALSO, reviews are pretty cool. Just sayin (:_

I woke up the next morning a little sore and extremely tired. This had been common for the past week or so.

It had been nearly two and a half months since the whole sonogram ordeal. And since Clare finally gave in to her sex drive.

Now fucking was pretty much all we did. She wanted it in the morning, on lunch breaks if we took them together, when I got home from work, before bed, and in the middle of the night if she happened to wake up.

In the beginning, I loved it. What guy wouldn't, I mean really? But as time wore on, Clare wore me out. A guy only has so much stamina.

This morning I was up before her, by some miracle. Just this once I thought I'd sneak out before she could catch me.

I got out of bed gently and tip toed to the door. Just as I had it half-way open, I stopped in my tracks.

"Where are you going?" she asked groggily from bed.

"Oh, I, uh… I was just getting breakfast for you, baby," I said, turning around and smiling at her.

"Were you sneaking away?" she asked, her face dropping.

"Of course not!" I said as I made my way back to her.

"Yes you were. You think I'm going to just wake up and jump your bones again. And you don't want me to because you're grossed out by me. I'm a whale, a big fat disgusting whale. Aren't I?"

"Whoa, Clare, calm down, baby," I said, sitting next to her again and trying to pull her in to my chest. She just pushed me away and sniffled.

Great. Good job, Eli.

"Clare, you're gorgeous. You'd be crazy to think I thought anything else."

"Oh, so now I'm crazy?" she nearly yelled at me. She got up and stormed out of the room.

I followed quickly after her. "Clare, please. You are absolutely none of those things. Don't-"

"What, don't freak out? Because all I ever do is freak out, right? Eli, just admit it. I'm crazy and you hate being around me."

"Clare," I finally caught up to her and I turned her around and held her in front of me, "Is that how you really think I feel? Really?"

She sniffed and avoided looking into my eyes.

"Look at me, Clare. I love you. You could be the craziest person in the world, which you're _not_," I lifted her chin so we finally made eye contact, "and I would still never want to spend a minute without you. I love you."

"I love you too," she whispered.

I pulled her close and kissed her softly. She wrapped her arms around my waist and hugged me tightly. I felt her quickly growing belly and smiled as I rubbed it gently. The fact that she was twenty weeks pregnant with two babies meant she looked nearly eight months pregnant with one baby.

It was getting harder and harder to hold in that she was having twins, but no matter how I tried to bring it up she always stopped me. She wanted to know nothing about our baby ahead of time.

"Thought any more about names?" I asked quietly as I was distracted rubbing the baby bump. She tensed up where she stood in front of me. For some reason she was always so uncomfortable talking about baby names. I figured she just didn't like disagreeing with me, which happened every single time.

"No," she answered quickly. I looked at her questioningly and she only shook her head in confirmation.

"Well you should probably have more than one name for each gender picked out," I said, trying to hint at her.

"Oh, of course," she nodded. "We can't make any solid decisions before we even see the baby."

It was damn near killing me now. I had to tell someone. Anyone.

Clare kissed my cheek and walked to the kitchen to make herself some decaf coffee.

I picked up the house phone and dialed the number of the person I needed to talk to the most.

"Hello?" I heard from the other end.

"Adam, hey man it's me. I was wondering if you wanted to get together later?"

"Hey, Eli. Of course, how much later?"

"As soon as possible would be great…" I looked around the corner and saw Clare staring out the window at the clear sky.

"Look, dude, I'm no booty call, alright?" he joked, causing me to chuckle.

"Ha, ha. I just really need to get something off my chest."

"Alright, I'll come pick you up in fifteen minutes."

He was there in exactly fifteen minutes. I told Clare I loved her and she kissed me goodbye. I hurried into Adam's car and we were off.

"Is the Dot okay?" he asked as he drove.

"Yeah, of course. Like the good old days."

I was eerily silent the rest of the way, not knowing how to go about telling him.

When we were finally situated in the café, Adam set me straight.

"Alright, time to spill it. What's so important, Eli?" He looked at me questioningly.

"Well there's something that's been eating away at me, something I can't tell Clare. I really need to tell her, but every time I try it just doesn't work out. It's really unfair to her for me to keep something like this from her… It's really weighing on me heavily and I know if I don't tell someone soon I'm going to explode."

Adam glared at me, confusing me.

"You'd better not be fucking around on her, Eli. Especially with a baby on the way. Dude, that's fucked up. She's way too good for you and you-"

"No, Adam, I'd never dream of cheating on Clare. She's my life, you know that." I interrupted him before he could go any further. "No, it's about the baby. The doctor told me we were having twins!" The weight was only lifted a little, but that was good enough for now.

"Wh-what? That's great, Eli!" Adam grinned at me. "Terrifying, but great!"

"Thanks," I breathed, sighing deeply.

"But, question. Why exactly can't you tell Clare? Or why didn't the doctor even tell her in the first place?"

"Well she thought the doctor was going to tell us the gender, which she didn't want to know. And when the doctor pulled me aside and told me, again she thought it was about the baby's gender. So now every time I bring it up she yells and says she can't believe I found out. It's getting pretty ridiculous, man." I shook my head and took a drink of my coffee.

Adam started laughing loudly. He was cracking up at my situation.

"What's so funny?" I asked, confused.

"Dude, how is that not funny?"

"Because it's stressful as hell! Can you imagine not being able to tell Fiona something like that?"

He just shook his head. "Just spring it on her when she isn't expecting it. Don't introduce it as 'So about the baby,…' because then she'll see it coming."

I nodded, "I'll just be relieved when they're here. These pregnancy hormones are about to kill me."

We sat and talked for a good while longer. When I finally got back home, Clare was sitting in the living room with a very pregnant Alli.

"Hello, ladies," I said as I made my way to kiss Clare. They both greeted me with smiles.

"We're just swapping pregnancy stories," Clare said as she and Alli beamed at each other.

"It's so beautiful, being pregnant with your best friend," Alli grinned at Clare. Oh, the emotions in this house.

"How far along are you now, Alli?" I asked as I sat next to Clare.

"About twenty-eight weeks," she said excitedly. "And it's a girl!"

"Oh, wow, congratulations!" I said with a grin. Clare was silent and I knew she was probably pissed again.

There was a knock on the door and I went to get it. I was surprised to see Dave. "Hey, man, what's up?" I greeted, shaking his hand.

"Hey, Eli, not a lot. Just picking up the wife!"

Alli appeared behind me and I moved out of the way so she could meet her husband.

"I had so much fun, Clare. We should do this at least once a week."

I hadn't realized Clare was also at the door until she slid her arms around me from behind. "Of course! Have a good night, guys!"

We bid them goodbye and returned to inside the house. We sat in the living room and watched movies until we were both tired enough to lie down in bed.

As I held her, I slowly slid my hand down her back. I realized it was completely selfish of me to only think of how worn out I was. If Clare wanted to have sex, we would have as much sex as she wanted. She deserved everything she wanted and more.

I kissed her deeply, and she kissed me back but only for a few minutes. When she pulled away she smiled at me sincerely.

"It's okay, Eli. We're both tired, we should just go to bed. Besides, the more energy we save up, the better it will be tomorrow night."

I smiled at her and kissed her again. I kissed a trail down to her stomach, giving extra kisses to where the babies were. I rested my hand there when I returned my lips to hers and felt a kick. My face lit up.

"I love you, Eli," Clare said softly.

"I love you too, Clare," I beamed.

_So what do you guys think, should he end up telling her, or should it be a delivery room surprise? Again, I looove reviews and suggestions!_


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